Lazarus
by Jasey Ray
Summary: Original Story- There was nothing exciting about anything anymore. Kayla was stuck in a boring low-paid job with friends she couldn't wait to leave behind. Then she noticed Peter. Nobody liked Peter, he was too shy and dorky, something Kayla never got.
1. Intro

_Intro_

They always picked on Peter. No matter what. It wasn't even that he was different, they just picked on him. We never got why, not even when we all went through our theories. I thought about it a lot actually, but it's not like I ever did anything about it. I even joined in sometimes. It could have been the fact he never openly liked someone. Or the fact that because of that he was still a virgin. It could have been the fact he was smart and did good in school. Or it could have been just because of how he looked. He was pretty tall. Taller than Rian, but shorter than Tyler. He had blond-brown hair that he wore a little long, not hippie-long or skater-long, just not a buzz cut. Then he wore glasses. Black framed glasses, because the wire ones made him look little and I think he just liked them. He didn't look five, but the glasses at least helped him look about ten. He dressed like the other boys. Jeans and t-shirts and he wore plain sweatshirts a lot with white ties. The boys all said he was gay, but he wasn't. You could just tell.

I never got to know Peter until I broke up with Bryce and we all stopped hanging out with Bryce and his friends. It all started one Saturday night when we first went into Marcus' new car. It was small, so there wasn't room for anyone. It was the night Alyssa and Rian had sex for the first time. Marcus and Tyler sat in front. In the back there were only two seats because it was a minivan and Marcus broke the way-back seat. Marcus' stuff was everywhere and he had a lawnmower in back, so it wasn't like someone could sit in the floor. So Alyssa, in her drunken excitement, said she could just sit on Rian's lap.

Tyler, who started liking me, was suddenly pissed he had decided not to sit in back, because now I had to sit on someone's lap. That someone was Peter. I never spoke to Peter before, other than casual hellos and sometimes he'll ask me a question about a story if we're in a small group. Other than that, we were complete strangers. He sat down on the seat. Marcus moved forward so I had leg room. Rian got in putting on a seat belt and then Alyssa jumped in. He held her around the waist and she giggled. Peter looked over at them. He probably didn't want to hold me around the waist because he was shy. I sat on his lap and we tried to maneuver a seat belt around us, but it didn't work.

"Get comfy, Petey boy." Rian said. I had to get out and Peter put on the seatbelt. He looked embarrassed because we were taking so long. I felt bad for him, as I always do. So I climbed in and sat on his lap. I shut the door and locked it, and then leaned against him. "You better hold onto me tight," I said laughing a little. "If we crash, and I break anything you're going to get it."

He smiled a little blushing. I moved his arms around my waist and he held onto me, tight to heed my joke, and then his grip loosened. It was nice actually. He was comfortable, and he smelled nice. But Tyler jumped in. "Kayla, let me know if you feel like he's holding the flashlight in between his legs." And he ruined it.

Everyone laughed, except for me and Peter. Tyler always told stupid jokes like that, it wasn't even a mildly intelligent one. I was tired and I didn't like Tyler so much, so I stuck up for Peter for the first time. "Shut up," I said. And he did.

Marcus turned on the radio and I swear I heard it. A quiet "Thanks" from Peter.

It took forever to drive everyone home, because Alyssa was talking to Marcus and insisted that she needed something to eat. So we went to McDonald's and Alyssa and Rian and Tyler and Marcus got food. I turned a little to look at Peter. "Are you hungry?" I asked.

"No," He said shaking his head a little. "I'm fine."

"Petey boy," Rian said. "You going to spot some cash for Kayla out of apology, so she can at least get something?"

"No," I said. "I'm not hungry."

We parked somewhere and they ate. There wasn't room for me to get off of Peter, so I turned and we sat like that. He stopped holding me and it was normal. Alyssa passed me her soda spiked with something. I took a few sips and then offered some to Peter. He took some too. We were all kind of drunk, except for Marcus, so maybe that's why me and Peter weren't that awkward.

Peter went home next. I kind of missed him when we started driving. I leaned against him a little, and his arms looped around me loosely. He held his wrists and it was comfortable. His house was pretty and white with green shutters. I got out and he unbuckled. Rian told him to make sure he wasn't too hard when he got out, but nobody said goodbye to him. "Thanks for giving me somewhere to sit," I said. "You were pretty comfortable."

He smiled a little. "No problem," He said. I didn't see what was so wrong with him- I never did. "Good night."

"You too," I got into the car and he turned walking up to his house. I shut the door and nobody said anything to me. They only made fun of Peter, not anyone else.

I think that's how it all started. But maybe not. Maybe it started before then, but it started then for me. I didn't magically fall in love with Peter. Because all the guys teased him, no girl ever liked him. I don't even know what really changed. We didn't talk to each other again until a little while later, we stayed awkward and dissociated. I would say hi to him every once in a while, but I didn't think of him as anything. I just spent my time avoiding Tyler, and giving him hints that I despised him.

Peter slipped into the background and I barely noticed him after that, but I know that first time was when it all started somehow.

* * *

**A/N: **_Hello, it's been a while. Anyone still use this? Reviews are appreciated and extensively analyzed by yours truly. But if not, just read and know I appreciate you anyways._


	2. Chapter 1

_Chapter 1_

I sighed, leaning onto my elbow. I looked around, the line was long, but I was too embarrassed to walk back in and help them out. I had rushed out to make sure I didn't keep my sister waiting, but it figures that she wasn't here yet. She never was. I sat on the picnic table, my feet on the bench. I'd have to move eventually, but I just sat there. I was too tired to stand around anymore.

There were mother's getting ice cream for their little kids. It was around that time of day when they all drive up from the play-grounds or the lake a few towns over. Mixed within the line there were kids my age, getting ice cream and sitting around their cars. I was always emarrassed getting them ice cream. Especially if I knew them personally. I wouldn't care if I didn't know them, but they all knew my sister.

I could see Alyssa inside smiling and helping all of the boys. Harper had taken over for me, and let me go even when it was busy. She was my age, but she didn't seem like it. She helped all of the mothers. Alyssa just helped the high school kids.

The Ice Cream Shack wasn't my first choice for a job. In fact I despised working there most of the time. It was back-breaking and boring. You had to lean over giant, dense cartons of ice cream just to scrape together enough for a small. My back ached now. I had blisters on my hands. I hated ice cream. But it was only the second week of summer. Alyssa and I applied together, saying it would be the best summer job. Free ice cream and hours together and money. That's all that mattered. But the working part was unbearable. Yet, it never phased her. She just kept smiling and tossing her hair over her shoulders.

I took out my phone and peaked at the screen. There was no text from Gabriella. I felt tempted to call her, but she probably wouldn't even answer. I sighed again, leaning onto my elbow scrolling through my phone. It was just June, and we were out of school already. But the beginning of summer felt like a million years ago, but that was just because I was used to being separate from Bryce. I was used to being single. And I found it just as boring as I did when I went out with Bryce.

I looked around again, sweeping the parking lot. I finally saw my sister's silver car pulling in. She was twenty minutes late, and I couldn't even yell at her. She was always late, and if I said anything she'd just start showing up later. I slid onto the ground and headed towards her car, parked ten yards away. She saw me, I knew she did, but she'd never pull up close to me. That's how she is.

The car is technically ours, but she always claims it first. I guess it's because she has a car-less boyfriend, and I don't. I don't even have a boyfriend. I just get rides from my friends, so she makes a point to remind me of this truth nearly every chance she has. I open the passengar side door, and she picks at her phone a little. I move her bag into the console, knowing very well she'll yell at me if I put it on the floor in back. I close the door and I wait. I don't say anything, and she doesn't say anything to me.

I used to wait for her to smile at me. "Hey, Kayls, how was work?"

"It was great! My blister broke today and I had to spend my break searching for band-aids so I didn't freak the cutsomers out!" I would go over this fake conversation in my head. They were delusional, because we never spoke to one another with any amount of enthusiasm. But sometimes they would get too obscene, and I'd have to look out the window to keep from laughing at myself.

She started driving finally. She turns up the radio, and we sit there in silence. I lean back against the seat, trying not to fall asleep. I'm exhausted. My feet hurt. My arms ache. I want to curl up and sleep. It's hot outside, but not too hot. But I am constantly woken up by the radio. The songs all going quiet and building up with peculiar normality. Gabriella doesn't look at me. She just drives me hoem across town. I don't feel bothered by this, I don't even notice it anymore. The silence it just a part of it all. Sometimes I do, but thank god for bad radio stations.

* * *

I get a call from Alyssa once she gets out of work. I expected it, knowing it'd come eventually. I sighed, squeezing a towl against my head before I answer. "Hello?" I say. I hear giggling, which is Alyssa on the other end. I bunch the towl up in my hand, tossing it into the hamper, missing by a foot as I always do.

"Hey, Kayls," She said. "Did Marcus call and say he's picking you up?"

"Nope," I said. "He never calls. Does he even have a phone?" She bursts into laughter. She always laughs at my fake jokes- not because she thinks they're funny- because she likes people to think she's having a better time than they are. She does this even around me. She used to fake phone calls too, just to look like you were lucky to have a few minutes in her presence. But I waited for her to finish.

"I kn_o_w, right?" she said. "Well, we're picking you up at seven, is that cool? We're probably just going to get burgers or something. Nobody wants to go to Carlson's, because it's always so boring." I can see her saying all of this. She's probably sitting back, twirling her hair. In my head, it's like the telephone scene of _Bye Bye Birdie_. I can see her gawking on her phone, dramatically swinging and bopping her head about.

"That's fine," I said. "Who else is driving?" We never had to worry about rides when I went out with Bryce, and I know everyone secrely resents me for that. Now we actually have to see who's driving so we know whether or not someone's going to end up sitting on someone else's lap.

"Peter," She said with an irritated tone. Peter got a car last week, so he started driving places. "I insisted that Marcus picked you up. Peter's car sm_e_lls. Don't you think so?" Now I see her picking at her nails, like she always does when she's talking about someone behind their back.

"I guess," I said softly. "Not really. It's new..."

"It's so gross," She said. "You'd think his parents would get him a halfway decent car. But it's _u_sed. Ugh, I hate it. It's so ugly too..."

"Hey, I have to go," I said. "Are you riding with Marcus?"

"Oh, yeah," She said. "Rian too, but that's it. Seven, remember?"

"Yeah," I said. "See you at seven."

"Hey," She said quickly. "Tyler asked to ride with Marcus, can I tell him to come?"

"Um," I said. "Doesn't Marcus' car only have four seats?"

"Yeah, but," She said. "You and Tyler are so cute. I told him to sit next to you tonight, but give him a chance. You guys are like, ten times cuter than you were with Bryce. Plus he wicked likes you, so you know..."

"Yeah," I said sighing.

"What?"

"Well," I said. "I kind of had a long day. I'm not really in the mood for Tyler to hit on me."

"Oh," She said. "I know what you mean. I'm exhausted. I had to call Rian and tell him I couldn't hang out after work, I'm so tired. But hopefully tonight we won't do much of anything. I just want to sit around." I shut the door of my room and sit on my bed. I listen to her go on a little more, but she winds down with, "So..."

"I'll see you later," I said slowly, I don't want to sound too eager. "I have to go."

"Bye, Kayls." She hangs up quickly. She always has to hang up first. I shut my phone and sit there for a second. I glance around my room. How did things get like this?


	3. Chapter 2

_Chapter 2_

We always went to the same burger place. In the school years, we just go if it's not too late and we have nowhere else to go at night. Like after a party on some random Friday night. Since it's summer, our visits to it are more frequent and dragged out. We sit at booths eating and drinking soda for hours. It was fun when it wasn't such an often occurance in our lives, now it's just annoying. But I smile as I slight into the booth next to Tyler.

Marcus sits down with a bag of food and starts opening the burgers, passing them down to us. He knows everyone's orders and passes them to people without much of a word. Then the fries are put in the middle so we can help ourselves. The food isn't so remarkable. I like it. The burgers are amazing, but the fries are too salty. I take a bite of my burger, and enjoy it for what it is. I chew, covering a spot of ketchup below my lip.

Swallowing, I look at Tyler. "Can you pass me a napkin?"

He drops his burger and goes looking for one. Peter, shoved into the corner, comes up with one and passes it to Tyler. He knows better than to give it straight to me. They'll all say something and he'll get embarrassed. Tyler smiles at me, and I press it to my face. It's been awkward now, especially since Alyssa had me go on a couple of "dates." I don't consider them real. We barely talk, and he usually just cracks dumb jokes that I don't get. But to him we're practically in love, and that got old pretty fast.

The fries are gone quickly. Depleted to a couple of hard little ends and soem salt. "Ty," Marcus says. "Come on, we need some more."

Tyler and Marcus always buy the extra fries because they eat the most. The booth is emptied and I get out. Sliding in across from Peter. What's even more awkward than me and Tyler is me and Peter. He doesn't look at me or talk to me; he didn't before but now it's more noticeable. I feel bad for him constantly too, because he's nice. I know he's nice. He isn't annoying or this or that. He isn't even that shy. He just keeps to himself unless he is moved to be a part of the conversation.

But my Peter awkwardness is more bearable.

Alyssa smiles at me. "You and Tyler are so cute," She says. I smile a little.

I don't know what to make of this cuteness between me and Tyler. He's actually pretty gross. He's pretty tall and muscular. His neck is abnormally thick and his hair is dark and curly- unlike Bryce's. Bryce had been tall and handsome. He had nice curly hair, and he was a year odler than us so he had a year of puberty ahead of all the boys- not in a dirty way. He just was less awkward than the other boys. He was evened out more, less extreme in one sense over another. He just had a terrible smile, but it was cute. That's why I liked him so much in the first place. He was handsome, but his smile was the cutest attempt at one.

Tyler is just greasy. He has a nice smile, but sometimes that's not enouh. Just like Bryce's cute smile wasn't enough either.

Does us being cute mean we're awkwardly cute? That we're cute like you'd think Peter is- like we were little kids still? Or does that mean we have some secret repressed sexual tension that makes us look like we're the next wonder-couple-to-be? They never tell you truthfully, so all I'm left with is cute. Rian presses his face into Alyssa's neck and she bursts into giggles, elbowing Peter in the ribs along the way. He just takes it, sipping his drink and looking out the window.

Tyler sets the tray on the table. "Hey, Kay," He says. "Can I get you a new drink?"

I looked at him. "Sure," I say smiling. "Thanks, I was just about to get up." That's a lie. I still have adecent amount of soda left in my cup. He takes it, smiling and shrugging. I can see Alyssa oogling. She loves setting people up. She can sense a non-existent wave of telepathy between us. But I guess she's the only one, because Tyler fills my Sprite with Cherry-Coca-Cola, which makes me want to vomit. And it sucks too, because I'm so thirsty.

I sit there across from Peter, sipping silently so I can get up and refill.

Tyler squeezes in beside me, pressing his knee against mine. I tug my leg away, glancing out the window like Peter does. I try to make the message clear, that I'm not interested. I just was a summer to be single. A summer just to myself, but I guess I'll be fending off Tyler the whole time. And that is just depressing. I wanted to break up with Bryce for four months before I actually did it, and I did it in order to have my boy-free summer.

"Kay-la," Alyssa says. "Stop being a loner. Come on, tell everyone about that lady who came to the Shack... the one with-"

She tells the story, I don't. Tyler smiles when Alyssa says something cute, he looks at me though, as if I'm the clever one whose telling him all of this. But I just smile quickly and look away. I look at Peter, and he raises his eyebrows up and down quickly. A small thing. I smile at him. He smiles back a little.

Nobody sees this, because he knows better than to do this when everyone would see.

* * *

Tyler and I are sitting now, on the bumper of Peter's car. Alyssa and Rian hold hands on the curb, and Marcus and Peter stand across from each other. Tyler bumps his hand with mine, but I don't look at him. I tug my hand away. I look off onto the ground, staring at a fixed point. I'm not in the mood for this anymore. I'm tired and I hate Tyler. "Kay-la," Alyssa says. "Geez, what's with you tonight? You're so spacey." She laughs as she says this. I look at her.

"What?"

Alyssa smiles shaking her head. Rian leans back on the pavement. "Nothing," She says. "Just checking to see if you were listening."

I just look down, nudging a rock with my shoe. It's tiny, barely noticeable. "It's getting pretty late." Peter says. "Can we go soon?"

"Then get out of here, Petey boy. It's almost bed time." Tyler smirks as he says this. I look over at him. He has this smug look on his face, like he always does when he says something like that to Peter. He glances at me, and sees my disgust.

"This is so fucking boring," Marcus says nodding, saying what Peter was really thinking. I look away from Tyler, crossing my arms and then one ankle over the other.

"I have to open tomorrow," I said. "I don't want to just sit around all night like this." Alyssa is unfazed by this. She just rolls her eyes and looks at Rian. Tyler looks over at me, for a second. Then at Peter. Peter frowns at him. Then Tyler looks at me. "It's not that late," He said. "It's only ten." He looks at Marcus. "I heard there's a party across town. I bet it's still going on. We could stop by... just to do something." I want to go home. I just want to get away from Tyler and everyone.

"Yeah," Alyssa says. "Let's just drive by."

I sigh sitting back. Peter plays with his keys. He and Marcus make eye-contact. I think out of all of us, Marcus is the only one who doesn't pick on Peter. It's always been that way, but it's not even like they're even that close of friends. Peter is closer to any of us than he is with Marcus. But without a word being said, Marcus tosses his keys to Tyler. "You guys go, I'm going home. Those kids are all pricks."

Peter looks at me. "I can give you a ride if you want, it's on the way," He says.

Uncharacteristically, I push off of the car. "Sure, thanks." Without a word, I go with them. When we all say goodbye, Tyler awkwardly kisses my cheek. He went for my lips, but I turn my face away. I give him a look, but he's too embarrassed to react to it. I instantly get into the back of Peter's car, which is a perfectly decent car. He gets in front and starts it. I'm tired, and sit back and look at his neck through the headrest.

I have never ridden in a car with Marcus and Peter. I expect deep conversation, some sign they're secretly best friends and normal around each other. As we pass Tyler and the others, Marcus sighs. "He's such a douchebag lately."

Peter nods in agreement. I wait, nothing else is said. The ride is completely silent, which strikes me as odd. Marcus just stares out the window and occassionally plays with the radio. My house is on the way to Marcus' which is on the way to Peter's. He pulls into my neighborhood and then up to my house, which is dark.

He stops outside the front. I unbuckle. "See you later,"

I look up, Peter's looking at me through his rear-view mirror. I smile a little, pausing before I open the door. His glasses are dark, making his eyes stand out. "You too," I said. "Have a good night." I look over at Marcus who's glancing over between us. "You too, Marcus."

He nods. "Yep," He says. "'too."

I open the door and get out. Peter was always nice to me. He always waited a few extra seconds after dropping you off. He does this to everyone whose at all nice to him. He adjusts his mirror a little and fiddles aroudn with the dash, before he pulls away and goes to drop then ext person off. I go inside, and tip-toe upstairs. I don't see a light in Gabriella's room on, she's still out.

My parents don't even wait for us.


	4. Chapter 3

_Chapter 3_

I had been sitting in a beach chair reading. When it was slow I made major strides in my summer reading. Alyssa sat there too, but she just texted Rian or talked to people she knew who stopped by. She knew basically everyone, so whenever someone came by she talked to them until new customers came. Everyone liked her, but they didn't know her as well as I did. Deep down, I know the boys just liked her because she has big boobs but it was always a little sad when I sat there reading my summer reading, and she talked to Suzy Smats-frats for a half hour ten feet away.

She helped the kids in our grade, and I usually just helped the mothers who came by with their little kids. I scooped endless amounts of dyed pink ice cream and covered it with rainbow sprinkles. I smiled when the little kids leaned up, their little hands flat and gripping the small counter, and all you'd see was their eyes as they told you what flavor they wanted. They always got the same kind too, but I pretended I didn't remember them at all- just so they felt important. I liked that part of my job.

While Alyssa was over there leaning over getting ice cream for some guy, I was helping little kids and making their day.

A woman came up with her two kids. She had a baby girl who always stood beside her, and a boy who stood right up on his toes and told me he wanted rocky-road in a cake cone with chocolate sprinkles and a cup in case if fell like it did that-one-time. I smiled and got him his ice cream. Then I got his mother chocolate and the baby girl a soft serve vanilla. The little boy looked up at me. "The rocky road is really good today," He said. "Did you make it today?"

I smiled. "Yeah," I lied to him. "You like it? We added a new ingrediant."

"It's really good today," He said. The mother laughed a little, and I got her her change. I liked them best, because you could tell she liked her kids. She didn't just tolerate them like all the other mothers did. They came every Friday. I'd always help them, and then they'd sit in view of the screen door and eat. The mother wore these pretty long flow-y dresses, and her kids all looked like her. They had the same olive skin and curly hair. And they were always so happy.

On my break I had rocky road, and the boy was right. It was really good today.

* * *

"Hey, baby," Rian always called Alyssa baby. I leaned onto my elbow and kept reading. He always came by, and she would always get up and talks in a high excited pitch. It was the most annoying part of my day. I looked up at watched her eventually. She rolled her ankle around and she smiled at him, curling her hair in her fingers. Alyssa, even though I hated her most of the time, was gorgeous. She was the lucky girl everyone else was jealous of. I don't know when we became best friends, but it was sometime when I started dating Bryce.

Rian was good-looking too. He was really tan and brunette, but he was boring. He didn't do anything in school except play lacrosse and get mediocre grades, but he dated everyone eventually, Alyssa now, which we had expected for as long as they knew each other. But I didn't find him that remarkable anymore. When I was fifteen I used to like him, but that was two years ago.

Behind him, I saw Peter. He looked uncomfortable and bored, he never got dragged around like this. I got up and went over to a window far enough away from Rian and Alyssa. I slid back the window. "Peter, hey, do you want anything?"

Whenever anyone came they always got ice cream. The Shack had the best ice cream in the whole world, so there was no going there without leaving with ice cream. He looked over, surprised by me. He froze for a second second, making out what I said and making sure he wasn't just hearing things. He started over, and came to the window. He leaned down. "Hey," He said. "Um, yeah." He stepped back.

I leaned onto my elbow, I was always tired lately. I looked at him. He looked at the overwhelming list of forty flavors. I never knew that Peter never had a preference on a flavor, but I watched him and waited. He fixed his glasses, staring hopelessly at the words. I cleared my throat a little. "The rocky road is good today," I said.

He looked at me blankly, or so I thought. "It is?" He said. "I'll have that then."

"Cup or cone?" I asked. I brushed hair out of my eyes slightly.

"Cup," he said.

"Sprinkles?"

He thought it over. "Sure," He said with a nod. It was sort of funny, in the Peter kind of way, the way he was acting.

I smiled a little, it was less awkward. "Chocolate or rainbow?"

"Chocolate," He said, smiling a little too. The corners of his mouth turning up.

I nodded, pushing off of the counter. "What size?" I asked reaching for a little cup. I had my fingers on the regular.

"Medium," He said.

Same thing. I picked it up and went down on freezer. I scooped him his ice cream. We were told to generally skimp, but nobody was really eating the new carton of rocky road, so I made sure I gave him a lot. I gave him a lot of sprinkles too. Walking back over to the window. I disappeared under, opening a new bag of spoons. "That'll be two-fifteen." I called up to him.

He nodded, taking out his wallet. It's been a couple days since I last saw him. "Are you busy today?"

"No," I said. "Actually. Today's pretty slow."

He nodded. He gave me three dollars. Then he tasted the ice cream. He nodded as I passed him his change. He had a little of it on his lower lip. After he pocketed the few coins, he got a napkin. "This is really good," He said.

I nodded, laughing a little. "It usually isn't that great," I said. "But we must have gotten a good carton of it."

He nodded taking another spoonful. "I'm pretty impressed." He said smiling a little. I smiled at him.

"What brings you here anyways?" I asked. Peter never hung out with Rian alone. And he knew what I meant by this. He shrugged, swallowing. He glanced over at the two of them, they were both laughing softly to each other. I don't think I've ever really heard them talk, they usually just laugh at each other and kiss. But I guess every couple in the world but me and Bryce always do that.

"We're meeting up with Marcus and the other girls soon," He said. "I just really wanted ice cream."

I smiled. He looked at me. "Guess we're going to Joe Carlson's house tonight, too," He said. Peter and I never talked much at all. So this was unusual, but he was easy to talk to, which was something I always kind of picked up on. I groaned. We always went to Joe Carlson's.

"I'm so sick of going there," I said softly.

He made a face in agreement. "Nobody like's Joe," He said. "I don't see why we always have to go over his house." He took another bite of ice cream. "Hey, Kayla," Alyssa called over to me. "Do we have anymore sugar cones?"

"Yeah," I said. I disappeared under the counter again and got her one. She met me halfway, getting Rian his black rasberry. I turned back to Peter. "Whose driving?"

He paused. "Me and Marcus probably," He said. He got another spoonful of rocky road. I exhaled, looking off past him into the road. "But Rian might be actually, his dad's letting him use his car today."

I looked at him. "Really?"

He nodded. "So I might not." He said, he looked into his cup. I nodded looking at him.

"I hope Rian doesn't," I said softly. Rian started driving lately, and I always get stuck with Tyler in the back while Rian and Alyssa sit in front. And Tyler's been much more presistent lately.

He looks at me. "Me and Marcus could always pick you up if you want," He said suddenly.

I shrug. "Thanks," I smile a little. "I'd be cool with that."

I didn't think anyone notices me and Tyler. Or even acknowledges how much I hate him. They probably all think we're cute, but I know Peter picks up it all. He nods a little, about to say something before Rian calls to him. He says goodbye to me, and goes with him. Alyssa sits down next to me. She smiles at me. "Tyler told Rian he's going to ask you out soon," She said.

I nodded, not saying anything. I smile a little at her before going back to my lawn chair. I open my book and start reading. Alyssa reads her Vogue next to me, and we don't talk that much. I'm too tired to put in the effort with her. We only start talking when Harper gets dropped off and it gets busy. But other than that we don't acknowledhe one another.

She didn't even see me and Peter talking, even when I know she hates Peter the most out of all of us.

* * *

**A/N: **_So here's my little check-in: What do you think so far? Honest opinions? _

_-Thoughts on Kayla and other characters._

_-Am I missing the boat on anything?_

_-Any characters you like/is this believable and relateyable?_

_-Is it interesting? _

_I would like some feedback as I embark on the rest of it, and I will appreciate anything that is said to me about anything. You could completely tear this apart and tell me to learn how to spell and I will appreciate it. Review, please, then, I guess I'm saying. I love you all._


	5. Chapter 4

_Chapter 4_

"Where are _you_ going?" I turn to see Gabriella sitting at the computer. She's just in shorts and a t-shirt, but she looks like she's trying to look good. It's only the two of us in the house. Everytime I go out she acts like it's the very first time, which I should expect, she's rarely ever home. "Out," I said. "Joe Carlson's having a party."

"Whose that?" It figures she doesn't know Joe Carlson either. They've only gone to school together for the past eleven years, but I don't answer her. I look out my window, and open my phone. Peter's picking me up, which I don't know how he managed because I guess tonight's the night Tyler is going to ask me to hang out with just the two of us. It's late, so I don't want to sit on the couch because he'll show up just as I do. "Is Bryce picking you up?"

"No," I say. She starts typing, that's enough for her. I pull back the curtains around our door. I see his car pull up, the old station wagon. "Bye," I say and head out. She doesn't say goodbye to me, not in tht three second gap between opening and slamming the door. She just goes on typing. I don't care, she's probably just going to sleep with her boyfriend all night.

Marcus is sitting in front, so I get in back next to Marcus' girlfriend. I don't know what to call Mary Ellis, actually. She's kind of in the middle. Her and Marcus hang out alone and hook up, but they never drive anywhere together. She's chunkier than most girls, and she has her eyebrows pierced. She's really nice, though, she smiles at me as I get in. She moves a sweatshirt into the middle. She doesn't just toss it on the ground, she takes the time to drape it over the seat. "Hi," She says to me.

"Hey," I say.

Marcus turns around to me. "Tonight's the big night, huh?" He asks. Marcus isn't bad looking. In fact I think he's really cute. He has big brown eyes and dark hair. He's muscular because he plays hockey and soccer, but he isn't gross like Tyler. He is taller than all of them. I roll my eyes, and he laughs turning back to the front.

"Why?" Peter says. "What's tonight?"

"Tyler's going to ask her out," He said. "He's telling everyone, the little douche-bag. Or Alyssa is. I don't know... I just know he's bragging about it." Peter starts driving, his eyes flickering back to me. He's always out of the loop on things like this, but sometimes I think he's luckier because of it. People get to bogged down with stupid stuff like that.

"Do you like Tyler?" Mary Ellis asks me, it's a harmless question. I look over at her, shaking my head. I try not to be a bitch about it. "I can't stand him," She announces to the car. Marcus nods in agreement. "I'm so sorry," She laughs to me, and I smile a little. I don't even care or feel threatened. I see light catch one of her piercings and I shrug.

"Thanks," I say softly.

Peter stops at a stop-sign. Marcus holds the back of his head-rests, his elbows scrape the top of his car. He looks back at Mary Ellis, and smiles at her a little. Not at anything, just because. They're cute together. I look out the window. Marcus and Mary Ellis start talking about some new piercing she must have. She has her hair cut really short, and it's dyed black, but she can pull it off. You'd never think Marcus would date her, but he is.

I wish I knew Mary Ellis, but I'm stuck with people like Alyssa. I always wish I had guts like her. She just dresses the way she wants and doesn't care what people see or know. I wish I was at all like her.

* * *

Bryce got a hair-cut, and like all his hair-cuts it looked really nice. I saw him across the room, but he didn't see me at first. I've seen him a couple times here and there, but never like this. I didn't feel anything looking at him. It was like looking at Marcus or Peter or someone like that. But we eventually bumped into each other and said hello. I asked him about something and we just started talking. It's weird. We weren't even awkward.

"Hey," I said smiling a little. He smiles awkwardly, and I laugh to myself silently.

"Hi," He said. "What's up? I haven't seen you in forever." Bryce wasn't the kind of guy who would say point-blank 'I haven't seen you since you dumped me!' but he gets around to saying it without it sounding pointed or mean.

I smile shrugging. "I'm good," I say. "How about you?"

"Same," He says.

"You cut your hair," I figure I might as well start with something like his hair. I mean, it's the first thing I noticed about him.

"I did... this afternoon. Do you like it? Nobody's said anything."

"I like it," I said, I sip the cup in my hand. "Your mother has good taste in hair-cuts." I say this as a joke, because I teased him once about his mother picking out his hair-cuts.

He nods, in all seriousness. "I'll tell her you think so," He says. He won't, he'll forget we even spoke. "Who are you here with tonight?"

I shrug. "Just my friends," I wonder if he's wondering if I'm seeing anyone. He doesn't show any emotion, he just looks at me.

"Cool,"

"You?"

"The guys. We don't usually come here, you know, Carlson's kind of an asshole, but we were bored."

"Yeah, I haven't seen you here all summer."

"What?"

"We usually come here," I say a little louder. "I haven't seen you." It's not that loud, so I think I might be mumbling.

"Oh yeah," He says nodding. We stop talking for a second. Then he looks around. "You get the job at the Ice Cream Shack?"

"Yep," I said with a nod. "I might make a career out of it."

"What?"

"Nothing," He never got my jokes. I don't bother with him.

He looks around, sighs and then back at me. "It's so boring here," He says.

I nod. "Tell me about it." I said.

He nods looking around. I sip my drink again, running out. I drain that last sip out, and then drop my arms to my side, opening my mouth to say goodbye to him. He notices. "I was just going to get one," He says. "Want me to refill?"

I look at the cup in my hand. It's empty, why not? I'm thirsty and we'll probably be catching up tonight. Then I think about Tyler. This could do it. Finish us off for good. So very stupidly, I smile up at him in the way Alyssa does, saying "Sure."

* * *

Bryce was never a conversationalist. We never had much in common, but since the only other person I've ever kissed was my gay cousin Stephanie, he was the best kisser in the world. I should have known this would happen, but you forget things like that. I forgot that my usual drink would have about half as much alcohol to him. He handed it to me and we stood there drinking until I got a little buzzed, and then we went upstairs. He didn't plan this, but he drinks straight vodka with maybe a little flavoring. He can't handle anything. So we're both drunk when we decide this.

Drunk, Bryce is the most worldy man alive. But otherwise I'll figure out he's just mediocre.

We go to Joe Carlson's childhood bedroom, with baseball wallpaper and all with naked girls taped over it all. We don't go crazy. We hook up like we'd do if we were a couple. I never expected this to happen, so as I feel it all drain from my head, I realize that it's pretty stupid to be hooking up with him. I don't like him, I remember how boring he is. How painful it is to sit in a room with him. I don't even feel bothered by our once-relationship.

Why did I do this? To get away from Tyler? I would have rather rejected Tyler than do this, but it's too late. Panic begins to flood me when I think about what Alyssa will say. She'll probably hate me for this. She'll look at me with disgust. Tyler will never talk to me again, and I'll be cut out like Bryce was. Did I want to avoid Tyler that much?

When my phone rings after two hours, I answer it pushing him off. It's Peter calling, and I'm a little relieved. I feel my stomach settle, and I exhale all those gross feelings inside of me.

"Kayla? Hello?"

"Hi," I say softly. I feel all the blood rush to my head as I sit up, but I feel so much better.

"Hey," He says. "Um, we're all leaving. I guess I'm driving you home, where are you?" His voice is calm, normal.

"I'm upstairs," I say, Bryce lies on his back and looks at me. He doesn't do anything he just waits. "Hey, I'll come down right now. Okay?" I inch away from him. I feel disgusting again.

"Yeah," He says. "I'll wait for you. Do you remember where we parked?"

"Mmhmm," I said. "See you there."

"Okay-" I hang up on him, and feel bad again. I run my fingers through my hair once. I just hung up on him like Alyssa would, and at that thought I freeze.

"You're going?" He asked suddenly, I don't look at him. I can't. I feel around for my shirt.

"Yeah," I pull it on over my head.

"Hey," He says. "I miss you, Kayla. Do you think we could hang out sometime?" His voice is soft. I know Bryce liked me a lot. He would buy me things I never told him I wanted, but would pick up and inspenct whenever we passed them in a store. He would leave me messages on my phone if I was mad at him. He was a nice boy. I liked him, I guess. I had to of, right? But I just got so bored. I am surprised I got the guts together to tell him I thought we should break up. I know I'll end up in a relationship like that again, but instead I'll be thirty and my mother will be pressing my for an engagement ring. I'll end up being married to some guy like Bryce.

I look at him. "I can't," I said slowly. I try to figure out what to say next. He's not smiling, so I can take him seriously. "We're not good for each other, Bryce. You had to realize that right?"

He looks up at the ceiling. "Kayla," He says softly. "I love you."

He never said that to me. And I am always the bad person because I broke up with horribly dull Bryce. The boy who just couldn't smile right. Alyssa secretly holds it against me because now we're stuck hanging out with kids like Peter and Marcus. Not Bryce and his equally boring but good-looking friends. I sigh looking at him. "I'm sorry," I said softly. No boy ever said he loved me before.

He sits up without a word, and like he'll do for the rest of his life until he meets another girl like me, he puts his shirt on and watches me go and follows behind me with no expression on his face. I say goodbye to him, and he smiles a weak painful smile at me. I hug him and then run away down the stairs and out the front door. I see Peter playing with his phone.

"Hey," I say. He looks up, jumping to attention and tucking his phone into his pocket. My voice shakes, so I snap it in place and try to keep it settled and smooth.

"Hi," He says.

I stumble a little over a crack in the walkway, but get to his car. My head is light. I can't believe I just did that. "You can sit in front if you want," He says suddenly. I get in front. Marcus and Mary Ellis are in back. He kisses her once, and me and Peter sit in front. I take out my phone and expect an awkward text from Bryce, but he doesn't bother. It'll be the last time that me and Bryce speak to one another.

Peter turns on the radio faintly. He drives Mary Ellis home first which is a long ride. It's in the next town, because there aren't enough Mary Ellises in the world. I turn and say goodbye to her and Marcus. They look good together. He smiles drunkenly and she pulls him out. He slams the door. Peter waits for them to get inside. "I love her," I say softly. "She's so cool."

My voice sounds funny. I am suprised I even said anything. It sounds all fuzzy and sad. I hope he didn't hear me. It's Peter, I can't act this way around him.

He looks at me. "Mary Ellis?" He looks confused. He nods. "She's really nice." Then he pulls out of her driveway, and off into the road. I look out the window, watching houses pass by. I swallow the lump in my throat. "So," He says softly. "Are you and Tyler the new Rian and Alyssa?"

"No," I say. "I avoided him all night." I feel drunk. I wonder if he notices, but I know I'm not. I'm just talking a little softer than I usually would. I look over at him. He stops at a stop-sign, taking off his glasses to rub his eye for a second. I've never not seen Peter with glasses, so I look for a second waiting to see if he looks any different.

It's funny because people with glasses sometimes do. Some people have those magnifying glasses that blow their eyes up, or sometimes their eyes shrink a little. I wonder if Peter's are like that. His eyes are pretty average, but what if they're really small and I just never knew. I've known Peter for two years and I've never seen him once without glasses that I can remember right away. But he puts them back on quickly and goes back to driving.

"I didn't see you at all tonight," He said.

I nodded, looking out the window. I think about Bryce. His little voice. _I love you. _

He looked over smiling a little. "Alyssa and Rian got into this huge fight," He said. "So I saw that."

I smile a little. "Is she devastated?"

"She hit him," He said. "It was pretty entertaining." He doesn't say this in a mean way, he just keeps driving, his voice maintaining a single tone. I laugh a little. He's not that awkward. I don't know why I always think he is, whenever I talk to him he seems just like any other guy. But I remember all the awful jokes and remarks made about him. And I look away, laughing again to myself at nothing.

"Where did you end up?" He asked, innocently.

I shrugged. "I ran into Bryce," I said. That was enough. None of the boys ask about Bryce, because they know you're not supposed to ask about stuff like that. He looks over at me for a second- I catch it in the corner of my eye. He knows. He can tell I hooked up with him. I felt dirty because of that. I never felt like this before, but I felt like such a slut. I broke up with him and I just hook up with him again. Bryce the boring boy who was the first to tell me that he loved me. I just used him, and Peter was thinking about that. About how much like Alyssa I am. Alyssa would do something like that. She hooks up with all of her exes all the time. Not me. I only have Bryce as my one ex, but I'm no better than Alyssa. Gabriella at least has the decency to get back together with her exes if she hooks up with them again. I frown to myself, not letting myself look at Peter.

"Do you still like him?" He asks softly. I look back at him.

"No," I said.

He looks to the left as he crosses an intersection. "I don't know him," He said. "But I always thought he was really boring. He never talked about anything by sports and stuff. I mean, he was a nice guy, but he was just too boring, I guess. I don't know, you don't seem like that." I look out the window.

But I am.

I don't know what to say, so I keep to myself. He clears his throat slighlt, glancing over at me. I lean back into the seat, looking over at him. He just drives me home, and we don't talk again until he says goodnight to me. I thank him for the ride, and he waits for me to get inside before he pulls away.

Boys aren't nice like Peter.


	6. Chapter 5

_Chapter 5_

I sat downstairs eating cereal on the island of our kitchen. We had one of those "vintage" kitchens, meaning my mother bought all the cabinets and counters and drawers and the island with the intent to make it look old and home-y. You were supposed to walk in and feel like you were off in the South somewhere in some little house where there was always fried bacon and roosters running around. Except all the roosters here were two-demensional and painted on plates she bought at Pottery Barn.

We weren't big cereal people, we usually just had bagels or toast, but my mother saw my favorite cereal on sale and bought it. She didn't buy it because it was my favorite cereal, she bought it every time it was on sale, and because it was the only cereal I ever ate: it was my favorite. I chewed loudly, knowing nobody was around to hear me. In fact, I chewed with my mouth open and everything. I dribbled milk onto the paper from last Sunday, and didn't care. Why care about stuff like that unless people were around?

Eventually I heard my mother's car pull into the driveway. She came up through the garage with a reuseable shopping bag in one hand. She smiled at me a little, and walked past me. "Hi sweetie," She says. My mother looks like Gabriella. They have the same eyes and soft nose and rounded lips. They walk the same and pronounce words the same. They are the same height and act the same too. You can see why we're not that close then.

But it's not like I'm my father's daughter either. We don't look alike at all. He has dark hair like my mother and sister. His eyes are brown and he's taller than all of us by a foot and a half. But you can see how because of him, I got bigger eyes, a sharper nose and less rounded lips. My eyes are blue, and to top it off, I got my grandmother's reddish-brown hair. It's astounding how my family gene's presented themselves in me. I have basically orange hair and blue eyes for pete's sake. But I can't do anything about it.

I just chew quietly, swallow, "Hi," I say glancing up at her. I turn the page and skim another article.

"Where's Gabby?"

I shrug. "I don't know," I say. "She's probably still asleep."

She shakes her head smiling. "She'd sleep the whole day if I let her." I look up, sipping milk up out of my spoon. "What are you doing tonight?"

"Going out," I say.

"Oh, is Bryce picking you up?"

"No," I don't feel anything when someone talks about Bryce. I felt terible the first few days after I last saw him, but now it's okay. Nobody knows, so it's not like it's ever brought up. Alyssa would have interrogated me about it, and Tyler would have stopped hitting on me. I never even said anything directly to Peter, so for all I know nobody knows about me and Bryce except for me and Bryce.

She goes over to the coffee-maker, making enough coffee for Gabriella and herself. They're caffeine addicts, the two of them. I try not to drink it. I mean, I like coffee, but not enough to tell them. I just drink tea at home. Sometimes, if I go out to breakfast with my friends I'll have coffee, but never every day. "No work today?"

"Not today," I say. "I have Thursday's off." I now have Thursday's off. I used to work Thursdays but I swapped days with Harper so I could work with Alyssa more. I don't know why I did it, and I don't remember when I did this, but it happened.

"That's fun," She says. She leans agaisnt the counter looking at me, and we hear Gabriella's footsteps coming down the stairs. I spoon cereal into my mouth as my mother smiles at Gabriella. I don't take it personally, she just always liked Gabriella better. Even when we were little. I look up at Gabriella, she's now in the fridge looking for something to eat.

She whines a little, closing it and leaning onto the island. She's standing right across from me, but I don't acknowledge her. I stare into my soupy bowl of cereal and chew quietly. I turn a page in the newspaper again and she stares at me. "So," She said smirking slightly. I swallowed one more sip of milk, abadoning my breakfast and getting up to pour it down the drain. "You and Bryce haven't hung out in forever."

I feel a wave of heat cross my back. She knows.

"I know," My mother says getting two mugs out of the cabinet. "You haven't mentioned him all week, are you two fighting?" I haven't mentioned Bryce since we broke up, which was more than a week ago. I swallow, placing the bowl in my hands at the bottom of the sink. I feel Gabriella laughing behind my shoulder. I turn and see her.

"I heard you guys broke up," She said. "Is that true?" She knows it is.

I look at her sadly, but she smirks still. "What?" My mother demands, her voice dripping with shock. I look over at her, seeing her eyes are wide. Her attention is uncomfortable. I look down and walk over to the fridge. "Why didn't you tell us? We deserve to know if something this big happens... right? You and Bryce were together for so long. When did this happen?"

"June," Gabriella says. "_I_ heard."

The food in the fridge is unappetizing. I close it and turn uncomfortably, looking at Gabriella's pointed skinny shoulders. I see them curl, just before she tosses her hair behind her at me. I look down. "I don't know," I shrug.

"Why? What happened? Sweetie, if he broke up with you, it's okay. Boys will break your heart all the time, don't let it get to you."

I looked up at my mother. "I broke up with him," I said softly. Then the room goes quiet. The air conditioner kicks in, the vents showering me with an icy gust of conditioned air. My mother falls silent. I walk around, glancing at Gabriella. She's shocked too. Because I don't break up with boys. Let alone tall, handsome Bryce whose older than me and can't smile. I hate Gabriella, for a good hour I do, I hate her. I want to go into her room and tear down the curtains. Rip her perfect bedspread. Wipe her vaniy clean of all the useless junk she clutters it with. I want to kill her, scream, but I don't. I take a shower.

When I come out, she's gone. My mother's gone too, shopping she says in a quick little note. And Bryce becomes and untouchable subject yet again, just in a different aspect of my life. I wish I was working today. But I spend it alone, sitting by myself in my empty house wishing I had someone to call.

* * *

I reorganize my bookcase. I don't read, so all of the books are the books I've read since the sixth grade. They're all that romantic junk they make into movies every month. And it's sad too, because when I want to read I always have to read them. Read about the couple with some connection to someone with cancer fall in love. It's sad to see how little I've changed.

I organize the books in order of when I got them, and it's funny because I remember. On the top shelf, there are the few books I bought last year for school. Books like "The Great Gatsby" and "Romeo and Juliet." They have hardly been cracked open, and I don't plan on over reading them either. On the next shelf I start my line of awful books. They fill four shelves. Book after book. All of them dreadful and alike in the same ways. I stare at the spines, all worn out from over-reading. Then I place knick-nacks at the bottom.

Rocks I got from beaches I visited on vacations. They're all pretty. When I hold one up to the sun it sparkles. Pieces and bits of sea-glass appear and cast rainbows on my walls. I line them up, and then behind them place pictures of me and Alyssa and Gabriella. We're all smiling, especially me. My smile is big and straight thanks to my long years of orthodontal service. I see Alyssa and Gabby and realize how ugly I am. How average I look.

Sometimes when I look in the mirror I don't think so, but everyone thinks they look pretty in mirrors when they don't. But it's only a few people- like Gabriella and Alyssa- who look the same outside of mirrors.

Then at the very bottom shelf, the last one. I place my shoes. Because I have nothing else to fill those shelves with.

I step back and examine my afternoon- my life. The books and the rocks and the pictures. This is what I look like on the inside. A bookcase of junk and boring average knick-knacks. I tilt my head to the side and try to see which rock is the pretty one. Maybe I should take that one away, but I think it disappeared somehow. Slipped away behind the pictures or maybe even fell into a pair of sneakers I'll never touch again.

And I stare. Because I can't think of anything else to do.

* * *

**A/N: **_Annual Prediction Query Time. _**Predictions, kids, I wannem. **_Predictions about anything. Even small things. _**Also, tell me please if you don't like certain aspects of the story. Tell me what parts you like. Tell me what you want. **_This story is very set and ready but there's still wiggle room if you know what I mean. _

**But, Predictions please. Be prophets for a short moment of your life. I would appreciate any review, even anonymous ones. Reviews are always pain-stakingly appreciated and adored.**


	7. Chapter 6

_Chapter 6_

"Hey, Kayla," I look up from my book, and see Peter smiling shyly at me. I get up, smiling back a little. He and Rian have been coming by a lot. Marcus will come with them sometimes too. But Tyler never does, and I took it personally and happily until I found out we were hitting a "rough patch." I can only wonder what he tells people when they ask if we're together. For all I know, he has a whole relationship fabricated at this point.

"Hi," I say. "What's up?"

"Nothing," He said. "Chauferring Rian around again." They've been meaner to Peter lately- much worse than ever before. He sees this too, and I hear it creep up sometimes when he talks, but never too much- he knows better. He makes a face, which melts into a harmless smile. I smile back glancing down at Alyssa and Rian. They're still at their peak, or approaching it.

"What'll it be today?" I ask, I lean onto my elbow, smiling a him. I wonder if he'll wing it or trust me to make his decision for him. I usually reccommend something for him, but sometimes he takes initiative.

He looks at the list, scratching the back of his head. "How about..." He goes quiet, thinking to himself. I see his eyes panning up and down through those black frames. Then they settle. "Rocky road." He always picks rocky-road. Always. Whenever he has to choose he does, but I'm certain he'll try anything and like it.

I smile a little, laughing at him. I got down to scoop. It's slow today, so I give him a lot. I always give him a lot. "Sprinkles?" I call to him.

"Sure," He says.

I get him chocolate, because he'd never ask for rainbow. "Whipped cream?"

He looks at me for a second. "Is it extra?" He asks.

"On the house," I say, walking over with the cannister in my hand.

"Sure,"

I squeeze the nozzle and do the perfect swirl on top. It's from years of training making midnight ice cream sundaes when Gabriella and I were little. Our parents would leave us with a baby-sitter who was a heavy sleeper so we'd always make sundaes like every kid dreams of. He takes out his exact change and I put it in the register as he tastes today's ice cream. "Very good," He says.

"I'm glad," I say smiling a little.

"Petey boy," Rian says. "What's that white shit all over your face?" Alyssa giggles, but I hand Peter a napkin. He looks down at the ground in resentment and presses the napkin to his lips. I look at him, Poor Peter. I offer him a sympathetic smile, which he smiles weakly at. Alyssa laughs again, getting Rian his disgusting ice cream flavor.

"Don't listen to them," I say looking at him. I've felt sad for Peter lately. More so than ever before, and I can't seem to figure out why. I guess it's just because he seems less like some kid I just am friends with through others.

He looks at me for a second, and then smiles a little. "I try not to," He says.

I look down at Alyssa whose tasting Rian's ice cream, and am oversome with disgust. I sigh lightly, my lungs filling up and deflating. I look at him. "Did you hear we're going out for burgers tonight?"

"Didn't we do that yesterday?" His eye brows went down, disappearing under his glasses frames. I nod, closing my eyes for a second. He makes a face. "Am I the only one whose sick of doing the same thing every night?" I had never heard Peter say something like that, so I looked at him in mixed shock and agreement. He always went along with us.

"No," I said. "I've never been so bored in my life."

He took a bite of ice cream as I spoke. He didn't look at me, but I hadn't expected anyone else feeling the dullness of our perfect teenaged summer. Someone was on the other side thinking what I was.

* * *

Five times a week I saw Peter. He drove Rian to see Alyssa at work, and as Alyssa and Rian fell more in love, Peter and I ended up talking more. It was the only times we talked, and it always went by too quickly. And just like everything else, Alyssa pointed out what was happening. On the fifth day he came by with Rian in a row, she leaned over a freezer looking at me. "Peter's such a creep," She said.

"Why?" I asked, but she expected more. You can't ask ambiguous questions to anyone, they always think it's rhetorical. "What did he do?" She laced her fingers, her perfecct unchipped red nails.

"I don't know," She said. "He's just being a dick to Tyler, you know. I mean, you and Tyler are obviously dating and he comes by here, like, everyday this week and flirts with you. They're friends, right? Shouldn't Peter know you're not supposed to go after the girl one of your best friends basically going out with?"

I looked at her. "Alyssa," I said. "I have been thinking about it... you know, like you told me to. I waited it out and everything, and I just don't like him. I'm sorry, I can't convince myself to ever like him. He's so annoying-"

"Who?" She asked. "Peter?"

"No," I said. I exhaled softly. I looked at her, looked her right in the eyes. She had to know I sincerely meant this. She has told me a million times to "give him a chance," but I just didn't like Tyler. I didn't want him telling people we were dating or hooking up. I was sure he was telling people we were basically sleeping with each other, when really he hasn't even gotten the nerve up to try and kiss me again. "Tyler."

She looked at me, sighing a little. "I know why," She said suddenly. She gave me a look of sympathy. "I know exactly why you're saying all of this."

"Why?"

"Because you hooked up with Bryce, obviously." She said, plainly. "Everyone's heard about it. Especially because he's going out with Justine now-"

My stomach dropped slightly. "Justine?"

She nodded. "You haven't heard?" Her eyebrows went down. She was waiting for this. I stared at her. Blinking and looking at her dumbly. She planned this. She held out on me for this moment. The moment when she could tell me and suck up my "devastation" and "shock" but really I was just surprised. Justine was one of those cheer-leader types who played field hockey instead in the fall. He never dated girls like that.

"Nope," I sat back in my seat.

She shrugged. "Anyways," She said. "Tyler's asking you out. Tonight."

"Tonight?"

"Yep," She said. "So make up your mind." She leaned forward pushing off of the freezer. "He's so in love with you." She smiled. "You should hear him talking about you." I exhaled again, looking off out the windows above the counters. She came over and sat down next to me. "I still can't get over how creepy Peter is, though. You should stop letting him hit on you like that."

* * *

...I opened my eyes in a car. I was asleep against someone's shoulder- a comfortable person's shoulder. I must have shifted or sighed or wimpered or grunted. "Kayla?"

"Mm?"

"You awake?"

"Mm,"

The car hit gravel. Stopped. Off. On: engine off, lights on and heat. "Hey, I got you coffee," I turned my face into the comfortable person.

"Come on, I got to get you home."

"S'okay,"

Quiet. Didn't move much, the comfortable person. They rubbed my cold shoulder, and I sunk under their neck. Faint lips on forehead. They didn't move. Stayed there. Breathing. Movement. Side of face. No glasses.

* * *

**A/N: **_I skipped my highly demanding homework to write this. Juicy, huh? A great man named Gatsby has inspired a new direction. _**Review, propose me something interesting. Let's chat, old sport.**


	8. Chapter 7

_Chapter 7_

I went it over in my mind over and over again, and every time I thought it was Tyler. But I didn't think it was possible. He wasn't the type of person who would do that, but he was the only person left after I considered everything I had left in that one memory.

It could have been Marcus. He wouldn't do that normally, but he could have just been stoned; then again maybe I would have rememebered the smell if he had been. But I might have been too out of it to register smells in my mind. So smell was discarded, but then I thought about his car. It had a single driver's seat and a single passenger's seat. I distinctly remembered sitting agaisnt whoever it was. But maybe I wasn't. Maybe they leaned over to me, or I to them. But Marcus had Mary Ellis, and I guessed he would have stayed with her. Even then I would have ended up in the backseat with someone. I must have passed out, or something, so I wouldn't have been left alone.

It could have been Peter. He was nice enough to, anyways. But his glasses. I felt eyelashes brushing my forehead- no frames, no glasses. I was sure he didn't drive himself too, but maybe that had been someone else. Maybe I had rememebered it wrong. Every way I worked it out, I lost details. It all started slipping, and my head ached. I lay there holding my head together, and tried to make sense of what happened.

Tyler drove himself, I think. If he likes me, he would have offered to take me home. If he took me home, he would have gotten me something to sober me up enough to get me inside. He doesn't have glasses. It was Tyler. I was so weak and sick that morning, the thought almost made me cry. I squeezed my eyes shut and breathed. I now had to be nice to him, he had been so nice to me. Boys don't just take care of you like that.

I inhaled quickly and exhaled a long deep breath. I slept through work by accident, but I didn't care.

* * *

I sat there in the booth. My hands were laced together and I sat across from Tyler. Julia was next to me, and Peter across from her. Peter and Julia were nothing, in fact I don't think Julia had a preference on boys. She just talked to girls and sometimes looked at the boys. We stuck Peter and Julia together because nobody liked either of them, and they didn't like anyone anyways. I looked beyond Tyler at Alyssa and Rian. They were sitting with Mary Ellis and Marcus, which was weird. But I guess Rian and Marcus have been getting along lately.

Tyler was pleased with himself, you could tell. He kept getting me things. Napkins, salt, ketchup, soda, ice, mustard, relish, mayonnaise, pepper, more napkins; all of it was pailed up around me and I just looked down at my now disgusting cheeseburger and tried not to look too miserable. Peter looked out the window, and Julia stopped talking to me for a few seconds.

"How were you last night?" He asked me.

"Fine," I said, my voice pretty high-pitched.

He nodded. He crossed his arms on the table and looked at me. "You know," He said. "I was hoping to ask you something, but you were so upset I decided to wait." I looked up at him. "I was wondering-"

Was I obligated to say yes? No. I didn't want to. I didn't like Tyler. I didn't want to like Tyler. But I owed him, and the only way I could figure out what to say next was to go with the first thing that popped into my head. My shoulders sagged as he talked. He smiled a little, and I saw Peter crane his head over to us. He touched his neck lightly, glancing in between us. Julia sipped her drink looking at me.

"-maybe we could hang out sometime?" He said. "Just us, you know. I want ot get to know you."

I looked at him, I tightened my lips together and half-nodded. "Sure," I said softly. I meant to sound friendly, but I sounded sad. My voice was crumpled up into a little ball of sound. Tyler smiled at me, and I looked down at my food. I balled it up and went to throw it away. I saw Peter looking at me. I exchanged a look with him, to see what he was thinking. My look meant nothing, but I think I saw that he was disgusted. or something of the sort.

I sank down into my seat after I got up and laced my fingers together looking down at the tiny spots on the top. He smiled to himself, humming a little. A short little three note victory tune. Even Peter was disgusted with me.

"Hey, Peter boy," Tyler said. "Stop staring at Julia's tits, you have plenty of pictures of other girls at home." Peter had been sitting staring at nothing with his hands underneath the table, but he glanced over at Tyler, giving him a look. I had never seen Peter give anyone a look, or even said anything about the teasing- he just took it. He fixed his glasses and picked up his drink and took a sip. I looked at Tyler, who just laughed again.

Then Tyler pointed. "Look," Tyler nudged him. "It's your boyfriend."

We all looked, it was Joseph Campbell. He was the only openly gay boy at our school, and was one of the nicest. He was normal, except everyone pretended he wasn't. Peter hung his head, looking straight down at the table. He exhaled, giving up. I felt bad for him, waiting for him to look up. I couldn't bring myself to say anything, I was just hoping we could exchange glances quickly. Tyler kept going, because he saw that he was winning. Even when we went outside he kept it up. Rian laughing and joining in and Alyssa, too.

Even though Peter lived closer to me, I let Rian drive me home. I sat in back with Tyler who touched my leg. I sat rigidly and stared out the window. When we dropped Tyler off he kissed me. I felt sick as his lips met mine, he snuck up on me. I inched back but he smiled at me. A smirk. Then he was off, humming his way up to his front door. We sped off, and Alyssa smiled turning around to me. "See! You guys are so cute."

I shrugged. "I guess," I said. "We're just going to hang out."

She laughed softly to herself looking forward, acting like I was kidding. I sighed sitting back. I looked out the window. I was almost sick to my stomach.

* * *

Tyler and I never hung out, but we were considered dating even though we never went on dates. I didn't see June ending like this for me, but it did. He acted like Rian did towards Alyssa. He would offer to pick me up- with Rian and Alyssa, because he never drove- when we went out. He came to visit me at work. He flirted with me and hit on me constantly. He tried to hold me hand and kiss me and touch me constantly. But we never changed.

I tried to keep from leading him on. It would have been easier if we had actually hung out, because then it could have not worked out and we could go back to being normal. But he never invited me out alone like he said he wanted too, so I was stuck dating him.


	9. Chapter 8

_Chapter 8_

I saw Peter less; Tyler replaced him in Rian's daily visits to see Alyssa at work. But when I did see Peter, the few times he stopped by for an ice cream, I found myself feeling excited to see him. He stopped one day randomly, the day right after Alyssa changed her hours. I didn't believe it at first, but I was helping a mother and her two kids when I saw his station wagon pull in. I kept my eye on it. He parked, and I took the mothers credit card. Running it throguh and giving it back to her. He then emerged. My body went tense, waiting for Rian or Tyler to come out after him, but he was alone.

I felt my heart go quickly for a moment out of surprise and happiness. Then my stomach divided into two, like an ameoba, and my head went light after such a drastic change inside of me. There was something so different about talking to Peter when he came to work versus talkign to Peter when we hung out with other people. When we hung out with the others, I wasn't allowed to talk to him. Alyssa or Tyler always drew me back into the group conversation, and Peter never wanted to talk to me around them anyways. His eyes always got sort of wide and he would glance around before he said anything.

When he came by, we could talk a little about things we had the last time. We were more like friends then than when we hang out. I smiled when he got to my window. "Hi," My voice flew out of me, I sounded so loud and over-the-top, but he smiled back.

"Hey," He said. He leaned into the counter, putting his keys down for a moment. "So, how's the rocky road been lately?"

I laughed a little. I missed seeing him. I missed him coming here, but I didn't notice right then, I was too excited that he was just there. "It's great today," I said. "But you missed out. Last Friday it was perfect." He smiled a little as I talked and I rushed getting him his ice cream. I gave him three scoops, and then sprinkles and M&Ms- only because he hated when I gave him extra stuff when he didn't ask for it. But he loved M&Ms, so there was that reason too. I was too slow, and he had his money ready: exact change as always.

"So what have you been up to?" I asked suddenly, feeling like I hadn't seen him for months. I saw him last night actually, and because of that he laughed a little.

"Same old," He said.

"That'll be two-twenty five." I said.

"Huh," He said. "You guys keep dropping the price, I see." I always undecharged him, and he was catching on. "Can I donate fifty-cents?"

"No," I said shaking my head, I couldn't keep from smiling. "We were told not to accept money out of pity, but thanks." He dropped two-quarters into my tip jar and handed me the rest. I hated when he did that, because he knew I'd have to fish out his deficit out of my roughly eight dollars in tips. He took his ice cream.

I leaned onto the counter towards him. He looked over at Harper. "Alyssa dropped hours," He said. I nodded. And we started talking. I told him that she didn't work Mondays or Wednesdays now, with hope that he'd stop by again. We talked for a while, much longer than usual. I don't remember what was said or what we talked about, but I remembered how excited I was that he was there.

Harper finished with her customers and went over to our lawn chairs and sat down. She picked up my summer reading and leafed through it. I just talked to Peter, who smiled and let his ice cream melt in between us. I don't know how long we talked, but eventually he picked his ice cream up and got his keys and started to walk backwards. "I might come by sometime soon," He said. "I've missed your ice cream."

I smiled. "Yeah," I said. "Totally."

He smiled at me. Waving, saying a quick see you later. And I sank down into the realities of working at the Shack. He pulled out and disappeared, and I turned heading over to the fridge. "Do you want a soda?"

"Yes, please," She said. I liked working with Harper. It wasn't so boring when it was slow. I got our two fizzy lemonades that nobody ever drank except for us. We had become addicted to their sourness and sweetness and we drank them every time we worked without Alyssa. I sat down and opened it. It always bubbled over, and I took a sip, sucking up all the soda that had overflowed onto the top.

"Was that Tyler?" She asked before doing the same.

I laughed a little. "Oh, no," I said. She looked confused, probably because I had laughed. I gave her an unneccessary explanation of who Tyler was, and ended with, "That was just Peter." To me, that was enough, but she remained confused. Her eyebrows stayed down and she gave me a weird look, but she accepted it.

"He's cute,"

I thought about him. "Yeah," I said considering it. "I guess, yeah, he is." He wasn't ugly, and he wasn't boring looking. He was cute, I guess.

She nodded and took a sip of the fizzy lemonade. "You and Tyler are dating though, right?"

I shrugged. "I guess," I said. "We've never actually gone out together by ourselves, but he's telling everyone we are."

There were times after I said something like that, when I asked myself why I was telling Harper this much. But she nodded in an understanding way. She wasn't confused by that. I looked down at my drink in my hand. "I just don't like him." I said. "But I can't get out of it. If I do my friends are all going to hate me, because last time I broke up with one of my friends we stopped hanging out with them."

She looked off out the window, then she shrugged. "Just tell him you like Peter,"

I raised my eyebrows, and laughed a little. "That'd make things more awkward," I said. But she was serious. I paused, then shook my head. "I don't like Peter."

She laughed at this, rolling her eyes. "Come on," She said. "Don't give me that."

"I don't," I said. "Nobody can like Peter."

She sipped her drink. "Why?" She asked. "Does he have an STD or something?" She was kidding around, but I thought it over_. Nobody can like Peter. There's something weird with him. There has to be_. I said that a year ago, and among my friends, it was one of the most memorable things I had ever said. It said exactly why nobody liked him. There had to be something wrong with him.

"No," I said, laughing quickly. I sipped the fizzy lemonade. It slipped into my, and sat in my stomach. I shrugged, and she sipped her drink looking up, seeing a woman standing outside the window.

"My turn," She mumbled getting up, and I watched her. She scooped a vanilla, a chocolate and got a chocolate vanilla twist. I heard two little kids outside of the window, their laughter slipping in with the wind. I didn't start reading, I sat there staring off into space. Harper obviously didn't see there was something wrong with Peter. But then why did the boys make fun of him? Now, it was for stupid reasons. So maybe that's why. For stupid reasons that didn't even have anything to do with Peter. And the more I thought about it, Harper had been right.

There was nothing wrong with Peter. He was no different from anyone else. He was, actually, more normal than the rest of us.


	10. Chapter 9

_Chapter 9_

I didn't drink a lot at Tyler's house the next Friday. When nobody was having a party, one of the boys always had people over, and we usually just drank in their basement and invited a few extra people so it wasn't just the eight of us. But because Alyssa was trashed, everyone assumed I was too. I had two, and stopped. I was sober, but Tyler was talking to me like I was a mess. He touched my knees and arms and hair, I would push his hand away, and he took this as a sign I was intoxicated. He would literally laugh out loud. "Come on, baby," He would say.

The others would laugh too, because they thought we were just a cute little couple. Alyssa and Rian went off into the dark side of Tyler's basement and started making out, and I knew this because Tyler asked me to come looking for them as a cheap ploy to get me to make out with him. We have only kissed that one time, but convincing Tyler of anything like that was ridiculous.

"I need air," I said suddenly.

"Oh," He said. "Okay, the patios through that door, I'll get us something to drink."

I sighed. "Yep, sounds good," I wasn't in the mood, and hoped he'd get a clue. But he just smiled, sitting in his gross red couch watching me slip out into his backyard. I didn't go to the patio, instead I heard Mary Ellis and Marcus, so I decided to hang out with them.

They were sitting on the floor in the corner, and I wouldn't have known they were there had Marcus not been smoking. The tip of his cigarette glowed, lighting up Mary Ellis' face and his own. They were sitting closely, but were not lost in each other. I watched Marcus inhale as Mary Ellis invited me to sit with them.

Mary Ellis had black hair that was blonde underneath as of lately. She bleached it, and it looked cool. She put on a lot of eye-liner tonight and wore dark lip-stain. She had just come from work, so she was dressed in black. She waited tables at a local chain Italian restaurant. She smiled, her cheeks folding in at two slight dimples as I sat down across from them with my legs crossed. I moved a drink out of the way with a pair of keys too.

"What's up?" She asked.

"Nothing," I said shrugging. "I just needed a break from everyone."

Marcus exhaled. "Tyler must be a pain in the ass," He said looking at me. It was funny, nobody noticed how much I didn't like Tyler except for Marcus. I had to tell everyone else. "Peter's been telling me about you guys."

I nodded. "He's just a little needy." I smiled a little. I didn't think Peter would ever pass judgement on anyone, but evidentely he has, and I was glad it was well-deserved. I told Tyler to stop picking on him so much a few days ago, and it's happened less since then, but I think it's worse when I'm not around.

Mary Ellis laughed quietly. "Why don't you tell him you don't like him?"

I asked myself the same question all the time. There really was no reason for me to lead him on like this, but then the door slid open, saving me. It was Peter. He came out, and we looked at each other for a second. I hadn't seen him all week. I smiled, my stomach filled up with bugs. He smiled a little. "Hey," He looked away, talking to all three of us.

He stepped around me and sat down a good foot away from me. I felt my cheeks burn slightly when our eyes met a second time.

"Kayla's hiding from Tyler," Marcus announced, and looked at Peter. Who shifted looking around for something, ignoring what Marcus had just said. Then Mary Ellis checked her phone and it got quiet. Marcus lite another cigarette. "I'll have one," Mary Ellis said. He got her one, offering the box to me and Peter.

"No," We said at the same time. "Thanks." I said afterwards.

He put the pack down next to his foot and lite Mary Ellis' cigarette. It was quiet for a second, as Mary Ellis inhaled and exhaled. Then her and Marcus started talking. Peter joined in a lot more than he usually does, but I sat silently. Leaning onto my elbows and glancign at him from the corner of my eye when he talked. I watched Mary Ellis. She was really pretty to me. She wasn't grossly skinny, she wasn't that skinny at all in fact. She was a little chubby, but she didn't look at all big. She was just normal, and healthy except for her smoking habits.

Tyler didn't look for me. I just sat there with the three of them, and was sensitively aware of Peter next to me. When Mary Ellis and Marcus had to leave, they left me and Peter there. We didn't say anything, so we sat there, our backs against the railings of the porch. And we were completely alone.

I moved so I was across from him, and he smiled a little at me. "Hey," I said softly. "Can I ask you something?"

He nodded. "Sure," He said. He looked nice tonight, but kept his eyes down.

"Alyssa said this to me the other day," I said. "And told me to ask you, because I didn't believe her." I was lying.

He looked up at me, his spine straightening. I could see his eyes through his glasses, not just the shadows they were hidden in. He waited for me to say it, because that was it. That's why the boys were teasing him.

"Do you like me?" I asked softly. I've never been moved to ask anyone this question in my life, but it was bugging me. It hadn't for a couple days, but now it was eating me up inside. I looked at him and waited. He forced a quick smile, laughing a little.

"No," He said. "I mean, we're friends. And I like you as a friend, but not like that."

I nodded, smiling a little at him. He played with his keys. Then he picked them up, a sign this conversation was over. "That's what I told her," I said. "Good, she kept bugging me about it. You know her."

He smiled a little looking at me. He didn't not in agreement or anything, we just got up. I fished my keys out of my pocket too. "You're leaving too?" He asked.

I nodded. "The last thing I want is to go back in there," I said.

He nodded. "I know what you mean," He wasn't that taller than me, but I felt like he was looking down at me. It wasn't an intimidating thing. He jsut seemed taller than I remembered. We both started walking to our cars which were parked next to one another. We didn't talk, but I stood outside of his car for a second.

"Peter," I said. "Why don't you like anyone?"

He stopped and looked at me. He shrugged. "I do," He says.

I just looked at him. All this time I've known him, and he's never gone out with someone, kissed anyone, or said he liked someone. Not to anyone. All the guys said who they liked, especially to us girls, but now there were only two of us- excluding Julia. He opened his car door, and I was illuminated by the lights inside.

He looked down. "There's a difference between liking someone," He said. "And having a chance, though."

I looked at him. "But are they really that different?"

"It's different, Kayla," He said suddenly. "You don't understand." I stood there, he looked down. Realizing how mean he just sounded. "I'll see you later," He said softly.

I nodded. "Good night,"

He got into his car and shut the door, plunging into the darkness. I went into my car and sat down. He was gone by then, already pulling into the main street. I watched in disappear. Did I have a chance? No, probably not. But it wasn't because I wasn't good enough, it was because I'd never be realized or noticed.

I started my car- Gabriella's car- and drove home. Where she was waiting in the kitchen, telling me I didn't ask her for the car and that all her friends were waiting, and that it was my fault, and that I should ask, because my friends always drove me places, and that I shouldn't be allowed to use the car whenever I wanted, because she sure as hell couldn't, so why should I get to, and that I was a reall bitch something, Kayla.

* * *

**A/N: **_I don't like to be the buggin, naggin FanFiction chick who begs for reviews, but I do like them. I am greatly inspired by them, and have missed hearing from you on the last few chapters. It's juicing up now, I think._** I am getting to a point where I can start posting fun stuff on my blog too**_, so keep writing back to me. Anonymous reviews are more than welcome, and named reviews are too. I love them all. _**So please, I'm asking you if you have the time to please review. I always write more when I review.**


	11. Chapter 10

_Chapter 10_

I was sitting on a picnic table when Peter came. I hadn't seen him for a couple days, not since Friday, so when he pulled up I was surprised. When he got out of his car I waved to him, and he started over to me, smiling a little. He walked over to me, and I perked up- smiling back at him. I had thought he had been mad at me, but now I felt like it was okay. Nothing was wrong and we could pretend it never happened. "Hi," I said.

"Hey," He said. "What's up? You're out already?"

"Yeah," I said. "They hired a lot of new people so I don't have to work that much anymore." He nodded, looking around. He stepped up and sat down next to me on the table. I laced my fingers together and glanced over at him, and the distance in between us. But I knew how uncomfortable he was, it was noticeable. But he just sat there for a second.

"I'm sorry for being such a jerk the other night," He said. "I know I sounded wicked dumb and melodramatic, but I just want to make sure we're still cool." I smiled at him weakly, but he didn't look at me. He fixed his eyes on the ground somewhere, he was really ashamed of that small grouping of words he had said to me. He had sounded moody and melodramatic, but I didn't hold it against him. I could never hold anything against him.

"It's fine," I said smiling. "Don't worry about it."

He smiled at me a little, fixing his glasses. "Good," He said with a nod. Then he unknotted his fingers and looked around. He was finished. He hadn't come for ice cream, just to see me. I kept smiling and watched him. "Hey, do you need a ride somewhere?"

"No," I said after a pause. Gabriella would be pissed if I just disappeared.

"Are you sure?" He asked. "I'm not doing anything, and your house is on my way home." He looked at me casually, but I thought about it. I liked talking to him, so here was my chance, maybe I could go with him. Just outside of our group of friends and the ice cream shack: maybe we could hang out a little. We could just go somewhere for maybe an hour or so, nothing big. It all started to flood my mind. I opened my mouth to tell him I could call my sister- a horn blared.

Ten yards away was Gabriella sitting in the car. She made a face at me, and I felt my cheeks get hot. I looked at him. "That's my sister now," I said softly. "But thank you." I didn't believe how disappointed I was. He didn't look at all bothered by this. He shrugged.

"No problem," He said. He got off the table. "You working sometime this week again?"

I nodded. "Alyssa dropped Thursdays," I said. "I'm working around 4, so it'll be slow." I got up, getting my bag behind me. "Maybe if you stopped by, I could give you a free sample of something."

He smiled a little. "Maybe," He said, how voice curling with his mouth. I smiled at him. "I'll see you later," He waved.

"Tomorrow," I said and I started walking towards Gabriella who beeped again- obnoxiously. I got in and Peter had already turned and gone to his car.

"I've been waiting here for ten minutes," She said, his voice fast and irratated.

"I'm sorry," I said. I buckled my seatbelt. She started driving and I sat back. He waved one final time at me as we drove past him. I watched him in my side mirror until we turned. I looked out the window, leaning my arm against it. I smiled a little.

"Who was that?"

I looked over at Gabriella. She was driving, not seeming like she cared. "That was just Peter," I said quickly. Not thinking.

"You seem to be over Bryce," She remarked. I was never in my life hung up on Bryce. Now he had his new girl, and everyone acted like I was heart-broken. But it never even phased me. I never felt jealous or annoyed with him or her. All I felt was pure indifference, so why did everyone assume I was broken up about him? But then I realized what she was saying.

"Oh, I don't like Peter," I said.

"Why do people always do that?" She asked looking at me. She didn't seem annoyed or anything, she seemed halfway normal. "I just saw you," She said smiling a little, pointing off into nowhere, maybe at what she saw in the parking lot. "You were oogling all over him."

I shook my head. "I don't like him," I said laughing a little. "He's just my friend."

She rolled her eyes. "Well," She said. "Anyways, he definitely likes you." She looked back to the road. I looked at her.

"Why?"

"Why what?" She asked. "I'm not him, how should I know?"

"No, why do you say that?"

She shrugged. "I don't know," She said. "You can just tell. Geeky boys are easy to read." I sat there for a second, then looked out the window. It was a nice summer day, the kind where everyone's lawn is covered with blotches of sun that shine through the trees. It wasn't too hot and there was always a tired breeze everywhere. But Gabriella still had the windows closed and the air-conditioner on. She liked it to be cold. I ran my fingers through my hair.

"Why don't you go for him?"

I looked at her. Why did she care? She didn't ask me about my life. She just drove me around and complained. For once, I felt the strange feeling that she was the same sister I had ten years ago. And I fell for it, like I always did. "Because," I said. "He doesn't like me. He told me so, he even told me he liked someone else."

"Trust me," She said looking over at me quickly. "He likes you." She then started driving. "Do you guys hang out? Or do you have his number?"

"Well, we hang out in the same group," I said.

"That's good," She said. "Just talk to him one night. Tell him you like him, and he'll cave and say he likes you."

"I can't do that," I said. "That's weird."

"No it's not."

"Come on, I'd sound so weird and stalker-ish."

"No, that's how James and I started."

I never knew much about James. Just that the summer Gabriella and him were together, she was never home and when she was she'd play these weird 60s records and come home with pizza stains on the roof of our minivan. I could see them, sitting on the roof with a box of pizza just talking and listening to Simon and Garfunkel and eating pizza in the middle of some parking lot on the side of the road. Gabriella's not like that anymore, but I used to love James too. Just because he seemed like the best boyfriend you could ask for.

I laughed a little uncomfortably and turned my head and looked out the window. We were almost home. She shrugged. "Try it," She says. "I guarantee it works."

"But I don't like Peter," I said suddenly, remembering. I had fallen for so much all of a sudden. I didn't like Peter. At least not that way.

She shook her head rolling her eyes, pulling onto our street. We didn't talk again. She dropped me off and went off somewhere. And I didn't see her again until the next morning when I found her in my room stealing something off of my vanity. I didn't say anything. She just stared at me for a second and then kept walking. Heading out into the hall, leaving my door open.

I could hear the possibility of intrusion. The door sitting open was so unsettling I had to get up. I got out of bed and showered. Sitting home alone until I left for work. I couldn't help but leave early, I showed up early and sat there in my lawn chair. Waiting for Peter to stop by for maybe a few minutes.


	12. Chapter 11

_Chapter 11_

Tyler sat there on the other side of Rian and Alyssa. I didn't know what had come over me, but something had possessed me and everyone despised me. Alyssa hasn't looked at me all night after she found out. And Tyler has been sulking off to the side since we sat down. I crossed my arms and sank into the couch. This was worse than when I broke up with Bryce.

Tonight was our first date, really. He picked me up, and started touching my knee as he drove. That's when I pulled my knee away from him and looked over at him. I don't know what happened. "Hey, Tyler," I said softly. "I don't know- I don't think this is right."

"What?" He said. It wasn't out of shock, he literally didn't hear me.

"I just think," I said picking my words slowly. "We'd be better off as friends, you know. This just doesn't feel like it's working out, and I just want to stay friends." I spoke slowly, and he turned down the radio and listened. That was all it took. A few short sentences and our not-really relationship was over. He didn't even fight it. He just looked at me in disbelief when we came to a stoplight.

I didn't believe I had just done it either. And he didn't say much of anything after that, other than a mumbled mess of words saying he guess it was okay. He never fought for whatever it was we had and just drove me to whoever's house we were going to. I don't know what it was that finally snapped inside of me, but it did, and for a few moments I felt good. I felt really good, like I did after Bryce dropped me off at home when I broke up with him.

There was something about it, and I don't know what it meant. I was just a terrible person, because you're not supposed to feel this good about breaking up with someone. My shock and slight happiness melted away much quicker than normal. It happened right when we got to the party. And all I could think about was what Alyssa would say.

We walked in together, he in front of me and I trailing behind. I stared at my feet, following his ankles. When we reached the front door I was almost ready to take it all back. In the second room I was almost ready to throw my arms around him and ask him to forgive me. When I heard Alyssa's voice I looked up. She was standing there with Rian, and I felt it all hit me. She was going to hate me. Then Peter turned and smiled a little at me.

He was the only person I wasn't scared of tonight.

Alyssa couldn't tell right away. She smiled at me and hugged me like she always does and added us to the conversation. I didn't talk so much, Rian and Peter sensed something was off. And it took a half hour for Rian to muster up the courage to ask Alyssa if she noticed something up with me and Tyler.

She gave me a look. Not just a look of disappointment. She hated me. She wanted me to drop dead. I ruined everything again. All I could do was drop my eyes to the ground and hang my arms behind me. I didn't want to stay, but Rian drove everyone except me and Tyler. I would end up with Alyssa, and she'd never let me live this down. I ruined our group of friends again. I fucked up.

But why did I mess up? I didn't like Tyler. I never did. I couldn't stand him, he was gross and he was a jerk. Why did I have to be nice to him? Just like why did I have to go out with a boy I couldn't even talk to? All Bryce wanted to do was make out and walk around parties. We'd never talk to anyone and he was indifferent to everything. Why was I such a terrible person? But I couldn't say anything. I just hung my head and followed the group around. We ended up sitting right where we are now.

Her and Rian were kissing and talking to each other loudly, enough for the four of us. They were just flirting and talking about people that weren't here tonight. I didn't listen, I didn't move. I just sat there. But they started talking about Peter.

"I drove by the ice cream shack, and he was just standing there talking to Kayla. He's so fucking creepy."

"Oh my god, no he wasn't. What the fuck? I bet he's just using her for a cover."

As if I wasn't there. They were treating me like Peter. I felt like I wanted to cry, and I knew what Peter must have felt like every time we hung out in a group. I looked up and saw him across the room. He was talking to Marcus and Mary Ellis and some other people. And I listened to Rian and Alyssa next to me. Going on about how he was gay and using me.

Then Alyssa suggested he wasn't. "Hey, Kayla," She nudged me. "I bet he masturbates to you."

I looked over at her. "Stop," I said, my voice was steady and hard. "That's disgusting."

She laughed, because she thought I was in on the joke. Rian laughed too, because Alyssa was so bubbly and giggly all of a sudden. She tumbled into her arms. Then she looked at me. "I can picture him now-"

"Stop, Alyssa," I said. "Why do you always pick on him?" I wasn't yelling at her, and I didn't know what I was doing. I never felt this feeling. This burning feeling inside of me. I wanted to yell at her, at my best friend. But she stopped laughing and looked at me, with raised eyebrows.

"What?" She asked. "Are you guys hooking up?" She narrowed her eyes at me. I then leaned forward. I opened my mouth to defend myself. I don't know what I was even getting into. I closed my mouth all of a sudden and sank back into the couch again, crossing my arms. I looked across the room at him. He just stood there. Not even knowing what was happening.

Rian must have said something, and she started laughing again. Her laugh riding up like bubbles of air. Everyone must have listened to her, and seen her. She wanted them to know she was happier than they were. I fell for it too. I looked up and saw Peter, he looked over his shoulder at her. Then glanced at me. I held eye contact with him. He exchanged a look with me. A subtle, unnoticeable flash in his eyes and I watched him. He then started to turn away.

I got up slowly, my legs getting heavy. Whatever was possessing my tonight was now in complete control over me. "Kayla!" Alyssa said still giggling. Her hand grasped for mine, but I started walking. What was I doing? I had nothing to say to him. I had no reason for getting up, I just did. I was within a few feet of him. There was the perfect window, I could say his name normally and he could have heard me.

I looked at him, his shoulders, smooth under a shirt I had never seen him wearing. He always wore t-shirts, but tonight he wore a plain button-down shirt. It wasn't formal, just t-shirt material sewn into a shirt. My breath was cool in my chest and I could feel my eyes anymore. I just felt so numb.

I had come to a complete stop, and I swallowed. "Peter,"

He turned his face slightly, hearing me. Then he must have seen me, because he turned and looked at me. He looked surprised. "Hey," He said. His eyes widened behind his glasses. I tucked an arm behind my back and held my elbow. My nails dug into my skin and I felt my heart thumping in my chest.

"Hey, um," I said. "Can we go talk somewhere?"

He raised his eyebrows slightly, and he hesitated. "Yeah, sure," He said. "Um-" He looked around, for something-somewhere-someone but I stepped towards him and took his hand into mine. I don't know what I was doing, but I just did it. I pulled him, and he came with me. He didn't resist he just let me pull him. I didn't know if he was there behind me, I just held his hand and hoped he hadn't disappeared.

I don't know why I was so sure all of a sudden. I couldn't do anything. I'd go back to being a coward in a few minutes, but he followed me. I lead him through a hallway packed with people to the end. There was an empty room, and it was full of books. There were shelves all along the walls. It smelled like books and fresh air that escaping in from a window.

He shut the door instinctively and looked around for a light. "Is something-"

I stepped closer to him, my hands moving up to his face. It was so fast, and I could help but feel like I shouldn't do this. Nobody did this. I leaned my face up and kissed him. Peter. Of all people. I didn't even like Peter. But I was here, kissing him. He was stiff, rigid standing there. As our lips remained against one another, he went more tense. He didn't feel like a human being, it was like kissing a mannequin. And I felt so disappointed and embarrassed, I pulled away, feeling my cheeks getting hot.

"I'm sorry," I said softly. He didn't want to kiss me. He didn't like me. I could hear Gabriella talking- stragely- and realized I had believed her. I loosened my hands on his face. His eyes were opened, wide, staring at me.

"What-" He said suddenly. He was lost. His eyebrows went down and then relaxed again. "What was that?" He wasn't angry with me, I moved my hands away and moved back. I bumped into a bookshelf, resting my hands on them. I looked at him. I had never been so humiliated in my entire life.

"I'm so sorry," I said shaking my head. I had no idea what to say or do, there was no way to justify what I had done. I swallowed and reached up pressing my cool hands on my skin.

"No, Kayla," He said softly. "It's okay."

I looked up at him. He wouldn't hold this against me. He stood there, so far from me, and I exhaled slightly. "I don't know why I did that-" I shook my head. I hated myself, I was just throwing myself at him. And he told me he liked someone, but not me. But I just decided he had to like me because my sister said he did. I hated Gabriella all of a sudden. This was her fault.

"Kayla," He said suddenly. "Let me catch up." I shrank a little, looking at him. He leaned against the bookcases behind him, and stared at nothing. Then slowly he looked at me. "If you just did this-" He said suddenly. "Just because you feel bad-"

My shoulders relaxed. "Peter, just be honest," I said. "Do you like me?" He looked at me, his eyes fixed right on mine. Then he looked down quickly.

"Yes," He spoke softly, but I heard him. The world felt so still and quiet. A breeze floated in and re-cooled the room. It slid slong my arms and shoulders. The panic suddenly escaped my body.

I closed my eyes for a second, and then looked at him. "I think," I said softly. "I really like you." Admitting it was easier than I thought, so I shook my head taking it back. "I do like you." He just looked at me, staring at my through his glasses. He fixed them. And we stood there looking at each other.

He exhaled. "Are you and Tyler done?"

I nodded looking at him. "Not that we ever were anything," I smiled a little, letting myself seep out from under my skin. I don't remember ever feeling this. I looked at him. He stepped away from the shelf, exhaling again, letting his neck dip forward. He was catching up. And I was slowing down. I waited for him. He took a few steps toward me, not knowing what to do.

There was a sense of disbelief between us. I realized in the gap between us- though seemingly slight- we didn't know each other. I didn't know anything about him that mattered. But I knew he liked things like rocky road ice cream and coca-cola. I knew him, in the same way I knew everyone else. And all of a sudden I was admitting to myself that someone could like Peter- that I could like Peter- in the same breath I admitted to the world and to him that I had these feelings inside of me.

I had never named them, but they were there- these feelings. I broke up the space between us and kissed him again. His lips melted into mine and we kissed. I moved my hands into his hair, and he touched my face slightly. His hands awkwardly resting on my skin. I broke apart smiling, and his lips found mine again after only a second apart.

...He grew tired of fixing his glasses so he took them off. I hadn't noticed he had, but I felt his face against mine. We had been sitting there, his arm around me, and I looked up at him. The lights from outside shined on his face and I saw him. I had never seen him without his glasses, but I stared at him, marveling at him.

He had cheekbones. His face wasn't childish anymore. It was square and handsome. More handsome than you'd assume it was, those glasses were just hiding it all. His eyes were normal sized, and fit into his face. He didn't look like a kid like I had always thought he did, now he suddenly looked older. I smiled a little, touching his neck. I had never been this close to him. He looked over, and I knew then I'd never look at him without seeing him as he was now. He smiled, self-conciously and kissed me.

Nothing was ever going to be the same.

* * *

He sat up, sighing. "Hey?" He rubbed his forehead, and leaned onto his elbow. "Yeah, she's with me." I looked up out the window. The trees were shaking and blowing in the wind. "Look, is Marcus still there? Alyssa's being a bitch to her- yeah, I know. We can just get a ride home with Marc. We'll find him, okay?" Rian must have started talking then, because Peter went quiet for about a minute. "I know, yeah, cool, I'll talk to you later." Then he hung up.

"Thanks," I said softly. He got up as I said that and stretched a little. Then putting on his glasses, he looked at me. But I saw him differently. I could see him hiding behind those black frames. I sat up, looking around the room one last time. I didn't know how late it was, but if everyone was leaving I guessed it was about eleven or midnight.

All I knew was that I wanted to stay in here. I didn't want to deal with anyone or the world, because tonight my life got complicated. My boring summer has been abandoned, I just formulated enough excitement to last until graduation. I didn't need anymore.

He just shrugged. I stood up and he kissed me quickly. We didn't hold hands or walk out into the party like we were anything more than who we were before. We walked an awkward few inches apart, a distance so wide our hands didn't even brush when we turned corners or walked down hallways together. I managed to stay a few steps ahead of him.

Outside it was cool, the sky wasn't too dark, the streetlightsd barely needed to be used. But we sat Marcus' car started and waiting. He walked over to it and opened the door for me. When I got in Mary Ellis turned to me and smiled slightly. "I heard what happened," She said after Peter closed the door. "Good for you."

I smiled, my lips curving upwards. Marcus adjusted the rear-view mirror. "He was being such a pussy tonight," He said to no one in particular. Peter put on his seatbelt. I watched him. He looked over at me and smiled at me slightly with his mouth and more with his eyes. Mary Ellis put on sad slow music, like she always does, and nobody spoke for the ride home. Peter was dropped off first.

"Bye," He said. He looked at me. "Are you working tomorrow?"

I paused, I had eight hours with Alyssa scheduled. "No," I said.

He nodded a little. "Tell me when you are sometime," He said. He got out of the car.

"Bye, Peter," Mary Ellis said waving. He said goodnight to all of us and went up to his house. We drove off to mine, nobody saying much of anything. Mary Ellis must have said something softly to Marcus.

"I don't know," He said shrugging. I hated that, when one person whispers and the other lets you hear the other half of the conversation. I sat there by myself in the back and looked out thw window. I exhaled once, and Marcus pulled up to my house. Mary Ellis turned to me. "Hey," She said. "Alyssa's being a bitch, don't let her get to you. You did what anyone would have done."

The fact that I had broken up with Tyler wasn't bothering me so much anymore. I hadn't thought about it for hours now, but I looked at Mary Ellis. "Thank you," I said, and I meant it.

She smiled. "See you later," She said.

Marcus looked at me through the rear-view mirror. "Goodnight," I said to both of them and got out. When I shut the door I heard Marcus talking, but kept walking. They didn't pull away when I got to my door, I figured they were still talking. I went inside and shut the door behind me. I heard Gabriella laughing in her room, probably on the phone with one of her boys.

In my room I changed and sat down in bed. I just lay down under my sheets. It all hit me then.

It was Peter. Those few nights ago. It wasn't Tyler, it couldn't have been. Peter took care of me and took my home, something nobody else would do. Out of all my friends, Peter was the only person who would have ever done that for me. Chills ran over my skin. It was Peter. I smiled to myself, hugging my arms tight to my chest.

I was so surprised with myself and with tonight.

* * *

**A/N: Give my your opinions. **_I want to start a collection... just kidding. (Cheesy ellipses use, I know. Just chuckle at it's charming-ness. Or recoil in disgust as I do everytime it's used.) _**I'm sorry for being such a pain in the butt. I didn't mean to be so spoiled.**_ I will try to be humble and remember this is just a fun hobby again. _**Thoughts?**

**1- Didya call this happening?**

**2- Was it too rushed?**

**3- Feelings?**

**4- How did you picture the characters in your mind? Do you like the characters? Most successful characters? Least successful?**


	13. Chapter 12

_Chapter 12_

I got the call from Julia instead of Alyssa. "Hey," She said excitedly into the phone. "Alyssa told me to invite some people out tonight. We're just going out to dinner and hanging out a little. Do you want to come?"

And I wasn't at all surprised by any of this. Alyssa would never call me, especially after I messed up again like that. To myself, I smiled, seeing an invisible humor in all of this. "Sure," I said. "Where are we going to go to eat?" I wasn't going to back down, and I knew Peter would be invited and would go. All I wanted was to see Peter, and ridiculously I expected him to call me first. I wasn't going to be the one to call him, I made the first move, and now it was his turn. I was surprised I had even done what I had the night before. I just went right up to him and kissed him. Looking back, that was something Gabriella would do. Not me. Never me. I wasn't like Gabriella, but I was happy I was for just a short span of time. Now I had Peter.

"Just the burger place on ninety-five." She said. "Okay, cool." Her voice got fast and bubbly. "Um, Marcus will pick you up at like six-thirty or somewhere around there."

"Oh, okay," I said. "I'll see you later,"

"Bye, Kayla, see you later."

"Bye," I hung up and then got up off of the couch and started to get ready. I only had an hour before Marcus was going to show up. I got ready pretty slowly- painstakingly trying to look nice tonight. I felt like I did before I went out with Bryce for the first time. I was completely nervous abotu seeing Peter, and knew Marcus was probably driving him. I'd see him the moment I got into the car, and the idea of that was exciting. It was almost like I was younger again. Back when I used to like boys before I ever spoke to them- just the sound of their names was enough to make me smile.

My father was home tonight. He sat in the living room on the phone, and I heard his voice continue on in a standard monotonous tone. HE was probably talking about bonds or stock or something. Some confusing minute form of work and money exchange that nobody ever explained to me correctly. I didn't say goodbye to him, and went looking for my mother. All I found was Gabriella with her best friend Emily in the kitchen.

Emily wasn't that pretty, she was average like me, and looked over at me when I walked into the room. Gabriella was talking about something to her, retelling some involved complicated story about two pronouns who got into a huge discussion in the middle of where-ever pronouns hang out. "And then _he_ said how disgusting her new boyfriend was, and _she_ went crazy on him. I mean _he_ has no right to just judge Cal like that. _He_ doesn't even know him!"

"Hey," I interrupted. "I'm going out."

"Okay, whatever," Gabriella said, glancing at me quickly. Then back to Emily. "Sorry- anyways-" And she went off again. I waited for a second, I wanted to tell her I had actually done something. I had actually gone for what I wanted, but she didn't care. She wouldn't care. I smiled a little and turned heading out of the room. Emily glanced at me as I went. I don't know what she was thinking; I don't think she really thinks too much, anyways.

Marcus puleld up as I walked into the foyer, and I slipped out without much of a sound. I opened the door to the backseat, but it was empty as I got in. "Hi, Kayla,"

I looked into the front seat, holding my breath until that moment. But I smiled, at Mary Ellis, because she deserved some recognition. "Hey," I said. Marcus started driving. He looked back at me with a slight look, not saying much at all. I just talked to Mary Ellis, and realized I had been cast aside. I was now the loser who wasn't allowed to ride with Alyssa.

We were late to the burger place, and everyone had food already. Marcus ordered for me and Mary Ellis, so we could sit down at the table. I looked at the group. Everyone was there. Peter was stuck on the end, he covered his mouth as we walked up and looked at me quickly, then down at his food. I smiled a little, and he looked up again, smothering his smile beneath his napkin.

Alyssa was sitting with Rian, but with her back to us. She was talking to Julia- which was funny because nobody talks to Julia much, let alone Alyssa. Mary Ellis brought a table over and we moved chairs over so we could all sit together. I wanted to sit diagonally from Peter, but I would have to sit next to Alyssa. I almost sat across from Mary Ellis, but I knew Marcus would be sitting there. So I ended up in the corner, in the furthest seat from Peter facing the counter and big light-up menu.

I knew Alyssa was doing this one purpose, but I just wanted to sit near Peter. I didn't care if we weren't allowed to talk or be like we had been last night. I just wanted to be able to see him. When Marcus came over with our food, I had to get my drink by myself. I am not going to lie, I am used to someone else getting my drink. But for once I would get exactly what I wanted. I went up to the machine and examined the different sodas. I picked Diet Coke, because I hadn't had it in a while.

"Hey,"

I turned and it was Peter, moving up next to me and filling his cup with some new ice. My stomach turned over and I looked at him smiling a little. I moved down so he had room. "Hi," I said. He looked over at me quickly and smiled slightly, then we back to refilling.

"Hey, um," He caught me as I examined covers. "Just so you know, Alyssa set me and Julia up again. I don't want you to think I like her or anything, but Alyssa does this to us a lot... and you know." I looked at him. I had never actually known that. I couldn't picture in my mind that Peter and Julia had ever gone on a date-type thing. But suddenly it all made sense. Why he was always forced to drive her home when we went out like this. Why he always had to sit near here. I felt so ignorant- I never noticed.

"Oh, it's okay," I said quickly. He reached for a cover and I took the same size he did. "Julia, really?"

He made a face, exhaling through his nose. I smiled a little, and started to turn. "Wait," He said. He reached for a handful of ketchup and some napkins. "Can we talk or something?" I looked at him, immediately assuming he meant now. "After all this, I mean."

"Oh, yeah," I said. "Sure."

"I mean, I could call you or something," He said looking at me.

"You could always come over my house," I blurted out. He raised his eyebrows a little, but accepted. I don't know why I thought of it so quickly, but I guess my sub-concious was smarter than I thought. My parents would be asleep and Gabriella gone; I wanted to spend time with him. It worked out perfectly. We walked back over to the table and he went back over to Julia. I looked to Alyssa. She didn't see anything, but she knew I was just getting back.

"Where's Tyler?" I heard her announce.

"He didn't want to come tonight," Julia answered. She was proud to have information for once. And Alyssa made a face, one that was meant for me to see. I caved in then. I slumped forward and chewed silently. I ate and didn't refill my soda. If I did I'd have to refill everyone else's. That's what they did to Peter, and used to do to Julie. Now however, Julie was free to get up and go get soda just for her. I was the new Julia.

The high point of this outing was at the soda fountain, which lasted only two minutes at the most. Tyler comments were forced upon the group by Alyssa. Mary Ellis stood up for me. She looked at Alyssa and told her to stop talking about Tyler like that. for the last hour we were there, she moved over across from me because she noticed me. Alyssa watched me, knowing she was winning. I looked down the table when Rian talked hoping I'd make eye contact with Peter. But he was hidden by Marcus and Rian.

When we were leaving, Julia stuck by Alyssa's side. Alyssa told her sharply to go with Peter, loudly enough for everyone to hear, but for no reason- I think.

I looked over at him. He didn't look ashamed, I guess for Julia, who frowned at this comment and tucked her arms behind her. I never was annoyed with Julie. She just was who she was, but out of jealousy, I hated her for a minute. She replaced me. I saw it fully in my own eyes. She was now Alyssa's best friend, and she was with Peter tonight. On a fashioned date. Made only by Alyssa.

For a second I was sure Alyssa knew. She knew I liked Peter, and she knew I kissed him last night, and that we hooked up. I was ready to scream at her. To tell her how much I hated her. But I looked to Peter. He just nodded quietly and Julia went over to him. He looked back at me for a second, before I looked away.

Marcus looked at me. "I'll give you a ride," He said. He was being nice.

"Thanks," I said softly. I realized he had said this to get me up onto my feet. I was still sitting. I was staring at Peter and Julia. I pushed off of the table onto my feet and balled up my cheeseburger wrapper. It was a tight sphere in my hands, and I walked across the room alone to throw it out. Turning I saw Peter looking at me.

He stared at me for a second, offering a slight smile. A sorry.

I forced a quick smile and watched him go outside, Julia a few steps shy of his own. We all filed out, spilling into the parking lot. Rian and Alyssa held hands, but nobody else was. I could hear Julia's voice rise up. "Um, Peter," She spoke quickly. "Your car's locked."

I watched him. He went over and unlocked her door, not looking at her. I don't know why I was so jealous of Julia all of a sudden. I guess I just wanted to be the one Peter was driving home. I was out of Marcus' way. Peter was coming to my house anyways. I deserved to be there in his passenger seat. But he got into his side of the car and smiled weakly at me. Then he disappeared.

I walked over to Marcus' car and got into the back. Alyssa didn't look at me, she and Rian just went away. Mary Ellis went into some rant about how much she despised Alyssa. I didn't join in. I didn't need Alyssa, and I didn't want to be friends with her. I was okay with this, no matter how miserable I was. I had Peter now. I was going to see him now.

And that was all I really wanted for now. I didn't need anything else.


	14. Chapter 13

_Chapter 13_

I waited for him, it took him a little while longer because Julia lived across town. I saw him pull up and tuck his car next to the neighbor's house, then my phone lite up. He was just checking to make sure I was here now, he didn't want to knock on the door and get my father or something. I opened the door and watched him hurry across my lawn to me. We didn't kiss, just said a quiet hello and I lead him to the back den.

The den was built on first, but stuck out in the back of our abnormally square house. It was mostly windows, but wasn't window-y enough to be called a porch. It had carpets and painted walls that could just be made out in between bookshelves of my grandfathers books before he lost his eye-sight. There were two couches, and without much of a word I shut the door to the den and went over and sat down on one.

He fixed his glasses looking around. I had turned on the light-switch, which turned on the strange lighting my father had picked out to be installed. It shined on the pictures he had hanging up and out of random corners. It made the room look like a museum exhibit. He must have been looking at all the windows and the weird, unnecessary beams across the ceiling. I watched him, and finally he looked to me and came over sitting down on the couch in the nearest seat to me.

I watched him, he was rubbing the palm of his hand with his thumb. "I've never been in your house, I think," He said quickly, forcing a laugh to sheild the honesty of his comment. We have been friends for three years and he's never seen the inside of my house, and it was true. Nobody but Alyssa has, because my house was never good enough for hanging out. Gabriella always had people over, not me.

"Really?" I said dishonestly.

He nodded, looking at me and smiling a little. I laced my fingers together and tucked then in between my knees looking around quickly. I never came in this room -nobody did- but that's why it was perfect. It was far enough away from my parent's bedroom so nobody would hear but so unused this was the last place they'd look for me. I looked at him. "So," I spoke, dropping my shoulders.

"I don't like Julia," He looked at me, his face melting into complete seriousness. "And I wouldn't have let Alyssa stick us together, I just didn't know what to say." I knew he was being honest. I knew he never liked Julia, and that my jealousy was completely false and useless. He didn't like Julia. He never did. Especially not tonight. He was here.

"I know," I said softly. My voice was low, and soft.

"Okay," He said. "I just saw... you just looked so- I don't know. You just looked miserable tonight, and I didn't know what to do-" His voice fell. For the first time since I met him, he held eye contact. His eyes were widened slightly and he showed no hints of lowering them from my own. "I mean, what are we doing now? Are we together?" He asked what we were both asking. What are we doing? What is this?

I paused, thinking for a minute. "I think so," I said. "I really like you," I tightened my fingers into a fist. "I just don't know what to call this."

He went quiet, looking at me, nodding as I spoke. He smoothed his hands out on his knees. We were both so tense- nervous over what we were going to say next. We never spoke to each other like this, and we never looked at each other like this before. "I feel like we're together," He said softly. He wanted us to be together.

I nodded, smiling a little. "Me too,"

He smiled at me, only smiling with his lips. I loosened my fingers, and they fell smooth onto my thighs. "What should we tell everyone?" I asked suddenly, I laughed a little, because I was so happy. He shook his head. "I have no idea," He said. He looked down, shaking his head still. "Alyssa's going to kill us both."

He was right. "Who cares what she thinks," I said. He looked up at me, and smiled a little. He knew. I didn't say that for him, I said it for me more than anything. I was with Peter, and it was simple for now. We didn't have to worry about Alyssa or anything. For once everything felt incredibly simple, but at the same time completely exciting. I kissed him, leaning myself against him. We just kissed. We, ourselves, were simple.

I had to work the next day, which he reminded me of. I tried to lie to him, but he knew. I sat there, hugging my knees loosely, watching him tie his shoes. He wore black chucks, just like every non-jock boy does. He put his glasses on, and I smiled. He got up pulling me ot my feet too. I kissed him goodbye, and he held me close to him.

I started walking him out, holding his hand and telling him to come by so I could give him ice cream. I opened the door and in the kitchen I could see her. She had just jumped up onto the island, and was sitting there kicking her legs and watching me. She smiled at me, as if she was in on some joke I was about to walk into. Peter was behind me as we walked towards her.

"Hey, Kayla," She said. "Whose your friend? I don't think I've met him."

I gave her a look, but like Gabriella always does, she kept waiting for me to introduce Peter. "I'm Peter," He said before I could open my mouth to speak.

She smiled at him, looking sincere. "I've heard a lot about you." She said smiling. "I'm Gabriella. It's nice to meet you." I looked down at my feet. She was just tryingto embarrass me, I could hear it in her voice. A slight indication that she was just amusing herself. She didn't care about meeting him.

He nodded, mumbling a "You too," And then they both looked at me. Peter leaned against the entrance to the kitchen and I crossed my arms. I looked at Gabriella, who stopped kicking her legs like a sadistic five-year old and was now sitting on her hands watching me and him. "I was just walking him out," I said.

"I figured," She said smiling, because she liked making me look ridiculous.

I nodded, pushing off of the entrance. When Bryce met Gabriella he slobbered over her. She was in a bikini, but he would have done it anyway. He kept smiling, and it was so pathetic, because he looked so funny doing it. She always told me how gross he was, but that was just because he couldn't help but smile whenever he saw her. All boys did. Even Marcus. And Marcus didn't ever look at girls like a normal guy. He gawked over her.

We got out onto the porch, and he leaned down, kissing me. Our lips stayed together, and he touched my waist lightly. I melted. He pulled away. "I might show up tomorrow," He said shrugging. "If you guys have good ice cream."

I nodded, smiling only a little. He kissed me again, quickly on the lips. "Good night," He said softly.

"Good night." I felt fuzzy inside when he said that. He stepped away and started for his car, cutting down the front walkway. My eyes followed him even as he fell out of the light of the light on the proch. He drove away after I slipped back inside.

Gabriella was coming towards the stairs, smiling at me. "Guess you did a little more than just tell him you love him," She said. I didn't really know what to say, so I didn't say anything. I just lowered my hands to my side and started for the stairs. She laughed a little at me, finding me particularly amusing tonight. I wasn't in the mood, and I wanted to be happy for now. Peter and I were together. I didn't want her to ruin it for me.

* * *

**A/N: Happy Holidays!**


	15. Chapter 14

_Chapter 14_

I expected us to be secretly together- to sneak around behind everyone's back. In my mind I had the idea we'd have the perfect secret romance. When we went out together in a group, and sat at the plastic tables at our regular fast food joint, we'd sit a few people apart. We'd never speak too openly in front of anyone, we'd just act like we did way before. Before we kissed, or spoke, or noticed one another. When we just hung out with the same people. We'd both become simultaneously aware of a certain moment, a small window of time when everyone was already swept up in something else. Julia'd be looking up at the ceiling for an imaginary draft. Alyssa would be exploding into giggles because Rian was touching her leg. Marcus would be getting us more french fries. Right then we'd look at one another, exchanging one glance that said everything. Everyone wants that. Secrets make everything more interesting.

But it wasn't like that. Whatever was happening was completely obvious to everyone.

When we went out to get burgers- even when Julia was with us- I'd sit across from him. He'd always get me refills, asking me directly, instead of me thrusting a cup into his hand and blurting out "Diet Coke." He'd drive me everywhere too when we went in groups. I'd always automatically go to his car and sit in the front seat. But I guess they weren't exactly tell-tale signs, because nobody said anything or assumed something was going on.

We'd been together a week when everyone went over to Samantha Weir's house. She was friends with the girls who partied a lot, so a lot of people were going. Peter called to ask me when to pick me up. When I got into his car, we kissed less awkwardly. Neither of us had been really that sure what to do, but now we knew it was okay to kiss each other when he picked me up and nobody else was in the car. Then we drove to pick up Julia and a friend of hers named Taylor. We had hung out with Taylor a little, but she was pretty good friends with so-and-so who hung out with Samantha Weir a lot. And she needed a ride.

Julia didn't say a word to Peter, in fact I guess she was pretty pissed at Peter because she couldn't sit across from him anymore when we got burgers. She just shouted in the back to Taylor, to make it clear she didn't need a guy like Peter in her life. I didn't know how involved their dating relationship had been, but he sighed heavily looking over at me. I laughed a little to myself, covering my mouth slightly. She was acting insane. She never even made eye contact with him.

At the party we didn't look for Alyssa or Marcus or anyone, instead me and Peter went into the basement where it was quieter. A lot of people were hanging out around the pool because all of the drunk girls were swimming and their friends had to make sure they didn't drown and the boys thought it was funny. I don't know why we actually went into the basement. Because there were a lot of people, but they were just talking and more sober than anyone else.

Sometimes I felt like we were trying to hide everything, but that's just because nobody pays any attention to us. We sat down somewhere and started talking. He was always a little nervous. Even now, but that's just because I could notice when he got tense. I reached out and smoothed my hand on his arm and he loosened up a little. The people in the room had forgotten about us, so he kissed me.

I hadn't been his first kiss I found out. But it's not like Peter has had some crazy fling-filled past. He hooked up with some girl named Stephanie a year ago, but he never spoke to her again. That was it. But it's funny, because the only boy I've ever kissed besides Peter was Bryce. So we're not so different.

We didn't kiss for long, only a few minutes. I liked kissing him. It always made me feel so bubbly inside. He pulled away touching my face, smiling at me a little. He fixed his glasses, and kissed me one more time before I sat back. He looked over, some girl was screaming candidly about her boyfriend. "He's such a dickhead! He doesn't even have a nice cock or anything... oh, shut up- you know what I mean. All he does is want to fuck and he couldn't even get it in until the fifth try..."

He raised his eyebrows looking over at me. And I smiled a little. We still didn't know each other that well, but I liked him. I don't know how it happened I just did. When we didn't talk about ice cream, we talked about him a lot. He wasn't very good at asking me questions, so a lot of the time I had to ask about him. Which was weird, because even though he felt nervous he didn't just mumble soft answers. He started talking to me normally and differently. After a little while, his voice would get stronger and he'd get used to the fact that we were just talking about him. He sat taller, leaning back into the couch and smiling and laughing at himself. He didn't fix his glasses a lot, and he just looked at me and talked.

It was nice.

* * *

We went upstairs looking for people. He had slipped my hand into his without me noticing, so we were just walking together, holding hands. We saw couples all over the place holding hands, but it was more exciting for us because we were right at the beginning. We walked outside and saw Alyssa. She was shouting back at Rian, something I didn't pay any attention to, and then she turned and looked at us. For a second I was happy. This was it, Peter and I wouldn't be a secret anymore, but her face was flushed with tears and she was obviously crying. She came up to me, her voice slurred and loud.

Peter let go of my hand and Alyssa threw her arms around me. Nobody was going to notice me and Peter anymore, they were all too distracted by the fact that Alyssa and Rian were fighting. I let her squeeze me and sob into my arms. Peter slipped away going to see Rian who was just sitting there rolling his eyes at the desperate and heart-broken Alyssa. I had dealt with Alyssa like this before, but I didn't want to this time. She hasn't even liked me for two weeks and now I was supposed to give her all of my attention and pity.

"I have to get out of here, Kayla! I don't want anyone to see me like this."

I didn't know what to do, I looked around at the boys. They were all useless. But Marcus got up grumbling, like what he was doing was so obvious, he took out his keys and tossed them to me. They thunked onto the floor, "Lock it up when you're done."

Peter looked up to me, exchanging a short look. I sighed and squirmed away from her. "Go to Marcus' car," I said. And she started to walk away, brushing underneath her eyes. I picked up the keys. "Back in the old saddle, huh, Kayla?" Marcus smirked.

I rolled my eyes, looking at Peter. "I'll see you later," I said. He nodded looking at me. He sat down on the arm of a lawn chair.

"I'm still driving you home, right?"

I nodded. "I'm not dealing with her all night," He smiled a little when I said this. And I turned starting to walk to find Alyssa probably sitting helplessly on the curb, still weeping. And I heard Rian say to Peter, "You finally did it, Petey Boy." I smiled a little, heading for the fence and slipped out. I unlocked Marcus' car. I could see Alyssa tugging at it in a way that nearly caused her arm to pop out of it's socket.

I smiled a little, when she tumbled back onto the lawn when the door surprisingly popped open on her.

Her whine penetrated the quiet lawn. "Kay-la-a!"


	16. Chapter 15

_Chapter 15_

I got into his car, which he had kept running to keep the air-conditioning going. The moment I sat down I sighed in relief just before I licked up a drop of ice cream on my thumb. Today was probably the hottest day I've ever experienced in my life. He looked over at me. "You're not sick of ice cream yet?" He asked. "Didn't you get this job in May or something?" He had already finished his, coming a few minutes too early to pick me up. I smiled at him, shaking my head. "I never get sick of ice cream."

He was wearing shorts, which seemed peculiar for him. I'd seen his legs before, but this was the first time this summer that they had emerged from his beloved jeans. They were pale and skinny, completely unmatching his slightly tanned arms and face. I wasn't going to tease him though, because I knew the guys probably already got a kick out of see his knees for the first time since last year. I pulled my seatbelt over me, and looked out at the street. You could see the heat rising from the asphalt.

"Where do you want to go?" He asked. He leaned back against his seat, stretching his arms up. We had a whole afternoon and night together now, the first ever. We usually hung out a little before going out with the others, but since Alyssa and Rian got into a fight -about nothing I found out -we were on our own.

"Somewhere with air conditioning," I said. He smiled a little, dropping his arms beside him.

"So, what?" He asked, looking over at me. "Do you want to sit in my car all day?"

I laughed a little. "If that's all you're going to think of," I said. "Then that's fine with me." He smiled, leaning his head back. I went on eating my ice cream, I was almost finished. He exhaled, and the air conditioning kept on whistling. I scooped all my ice cream- a little soup of chocolate marshmellows and sprinkles- into one last bite and finished it off opening the door and dropping it onto the ground. He watched me but didn't say anything, because he probably did the same thing five minutes ago. I sat back and thought for a minute.

"If you want, we can just go over my house," I said. "My parents are gone all day and Gabriella's never around... then we could always get food later. I have air conditioning."

"And it'll be cooler tonight," He said, indirectly agreeing with me.

I nodded. "Let's go," I said lightly slapping his pale boney knee. He smiled at me, leaning in to kiss me. We just kissed once, and then he started pulling out. I felt butterflies just feeling his hand on my seat as we backed out. I looked at him. His hair was flat today because of the heat, but he looked cute. I turned the air conditioning up, and we started driving.

* * *

I sat down on my bed crossing my legs- sitting with them shaped like a pretzel. He stood in my doorway for a second looking around. It was funny too, because he just hung outside for a few seconds looking around to make sure the coast was clear. Then he walked in. "You can shut the door if you want," I said. I wanted to shut the door, really, because if Gabriella did come home I didn't want her to embarrass me in front of him. I knew it was weird, because Peter doesn't care about stuff like that. But he turned sharply reaching for the door-handle. He shut it sort of quietly too, probably because he'd never been in my room before, probably because he thought someone might be home. Then he turned to me.

He hadn't been nervous today, but I could tell he was now. He looked around, avoiding eye contact. He didn't really know what to do, because he had never been in my room before and he probably just didn't want to sit on my bed. So I smiled at him. "You can sit with me," I said.

He blushed sort of at this, and walked over sitting down next to me. He didn't turn bright red, but just below his glasses you could see it get sort of pink. I turned to look at him now, and he looked around at my vanity and my bookcase. It never crossed my mind that Peter had never done anything like this before. Coming up into a girl's room when her parent weren't home. It didn't seem like a big deal to me, but it was my first time too. Bryce never even came into my room- he wasn't allowed. But here Peter was, sitting helplessly trying to find something to say. "You read a lot, don't you?" He said.

I looked over my shoulder at it. My stupid book-case. "Kind of," I said. "I mean, I used to. But now I don't really know what to read." He nodded still looking over at the books. I didn't want him to see them, they were all those gushy love stories that I used to like. "What about you?"

"Yeah," He said. "But I never read as much as I'd like."

Now we really didn't know what to say. But he looked over at me. "I was talking to my step brother the other night," He said, faking confidence. "And he said he knew your sister. Did she graduate last year?"

"Oh, no," I said quickly shaking me head. "She's still a senior." It bothered me. The fact that he was bringing her up. We never talked abotu her before, not even after he first met her. But she came up almost out of nowhere. I don't know what made him think of her, or think to ask me. It had to be innocent. I looked down, lacing my fingers together. He nodded, looking down, squeezing his hands together in between his knees. I tucked a piece of hair behind my ear.

"I didn't know that," He said looking at me, he cleared his throat quickly. I looked up to him, he pulled his hands out from his knees and rested them on his thighs. They were losely wrapped together. And he looked at me. His glasses didn't need to be fixed. "When I met her the other night, it's the first time I'd ever seen her. Does she go to our school?"

I nodded. "She doesn't really do anything," I said. "But she's popular... everyone knows her. You know what I mean, she's just one of those people everyone knows about. She goes out with a lot of guys from other towns, but everyone from our school treats her like she's a celebrity when she barely even acts like she goes there." I didn't know why Peter had never known she went to our school- he was in different classes from the rest of us, but he didn't live under a rock. I guess he didn't pay attention to that stuff. I saw him enough in school, he was always in lunches with the rest of us, and always sat with us. Even when he had to study for a test, he just sat there studying and faintly listening to us. Nobody took the same classes as him, but he still hung out with us during school when he could.

He nodded, looking around my room again. "I wouldn't have even thought she was your sister," He said. "You guys don't look at all alike." I looked up at him, and smiled a little. He was just looking over to my window. It looked out to the backyard. He was uncomfortable, I could tell. But he was trying. Then he looked back at me and asked me about some picture I had on my wall. Changing the subject. He got me talking, like I always did, which was a first for us.

* * *

We had been kissing, he was lying down now, with his shoes off. I leaned over him, and we kissed like that. My room was cool, and we were both comfortable. We weren't kissing so much anymore, and we were gettign goofy. One of us would mumble something silly as we kissed, and the other would either laugh or answer. I laughed easily, and he started to goofily kiss my cheeks as I laughed.

"Stop," I laughed.

So he would kiss my ears, or my chin. Then he would kiss my nose. Eventually I would sit up to pull away but he would move with me. Kissing was always okay for us, because it didn't matter what either of us said. We just knew we liked each other. He didn't have to worry about anything, because he was used to kissing now, and he knew I liked kissing him. It was always so simple for us. It wasn't about sex or doing stuff, it was just about kissing.

I pushed him away still laughing, but he moved his arms around me and pulled me down. I moved so I was lying on top of him. He kepts holding me, so I couldn't keep all my weight off of him. And we just started kissing again. I closed my eyes and melted away into it. The front door opened and slammed shut- I could hear her running upstairs- "Kayla? You here?"

"Yeah," He moved his lips then to my neck and kissed me there. I breathed, listening to her.

"I'm going out, tell mom if you see her."

"Okay," I said softly. It was quiet, then I heard her rushing downstairs and she was gone. Peter kissed me again and we shifted so we were both lying on our sides. I touched his back, and it was just the two of us again. We were lying so close to one another, and we were both intensely sensitive to that. He touched my face, letting his hand fall natrally wherever it fell. We were more used to each other.

I don't know how to describe it, but he seemed less like a Peter and more like a person to me.

* * *

In the car he pointed out that this was sort of like our first date. He was right too, but I couldn't believe I missed it. I had been worrying about our first date for a while- especially since I had never really gone on a real first date. You know: the whole movie definition. You don't know the boy too well, and you're not boyfriend-girlfriend yet, but you know you really like each other and have kissed before- maybe not. You hang out and go get something to eat, where you sit awkwardly scrambling to get to know one another and act like yourself. Then the boy would drive you home and you'd kiss in his car. You'd get into the house and he'd text you something nice and you'd be happy for a week.

We went to a little chain place, it was the kind of place that your mother used to take you when you were little. It was all colorful inside with blue booths and window dividers. You didn't care about the food- you were more concerned with the ice cream you'd get after. I picked the place, and he was happy to go. He wasn't faking it either, he started driving, taking the closest turn to go into the right direction.

This was it, my first real date.

"I guess you're right," I said to him after he pointed it out. "Yeah, this is it."

The place was on the side of the highway, and it was pretty empty because it was a Tuesday night. There were a few people, mothers and little kids and maybe an old couple here and there. But we were the only people around our age sitting down. We went over the menu. I watched him. We both did the same thing. We laid out the menu flat in front of us and looked at it. He ran his finger down everything. I had no idea what to get. I didn't know what I was in the mood for.

"What are you getting?" I asked, knowing he hadn't made up his mind.

"I don't know," He said, his eyebrows going down. "I can never make up my mind." I should have known that. I looked down to the menu again, and turned the page. I wasn't starving- I never ate a lot.

"Oh," I put my finger down. "They brought their grilled cheeses back."

"What?" He turned the page and saw. "I used to get those when I was a little kid." He was excited about this. We had our mind made up before the waitress even came by. We got two cokes and two grilled cheeses. IT was cute too, because when she started walking over to us, he told me he was going to order for me. He smiled when he said it to. "You know, because it's our first date and all."

I laughed and he order for us. I didn't mind so much that this was our first date. They happen like this sometimes. Then she took our menus and we were left to ourselves. We didn't talk too much about anything until she brought us our cokes. It was known that you should never start any real conversation until after your drinks come because then you'll just get interrupted and distracted.

After they did come and we got that all out of the way, he started asking me questions. Now he had some reasons to ask questions. He had me say enough to have something to go off from. We sat there in the little warm restaurant and eat grilled cheeses while he asks and I answer. It's nice, and he looks at me- peering through his glasses- and listens. My stomach shakes when I see him looking at me when I had let my eyes wander from him for a moment.

When the waitress comes with the bill he won't let me pay. He says it's our first date and that he should be allowed to pay. I keep insisting, but he gets rid of the bill too quickly. He then gives me a look, a hard angry look- meant to be ironic, because he could never bget angry like that. "Put your money away, now." He speaks through gritted teeth.

I exhale, trying not to laugh at him as his face breaks apart and he smiles slightly. I put the money away. I'll give him free ice cream tomorrow.

* * *

**A/N: **_How are you all? Give me a review please, if you may, and_** tell me what your favorite part in this has been so far. **_I took a small break over my winter vacation from writing and spent three-seven hours a day reading. How was your Holidays? _**I'll be back to posting now, reviews are always appreciated.**


	17. Chapter 16

_Chapter 16_

When he drops me off, we sit in his car. The engine's off and it's dark, cool summer air floats through unseen cracks in the windows. My eyes are closed and we are kissing, innocently in the front seat. It's still early, but I have work tomorrow. And even though we're parked by the fence outside my house- ready for me to get out and run inside- we kiss, lost in time. He pulls away finally, holding my face apart from his. His glasses managed to remain still on his nose. "Can I come see you tomorrow?" My hands slide down his wrists, loosely holding them and looking at his barely illuminated face. I nod, leaning in to kiss him again. "Yes," I say to his lips. We go silent, and finally he pulls away again. This time to say goodbye for the final time.

"Goodnight," I reach for the door.

"Night," He says watching me. I open the door and we are flooded in plastic light. I look to him, and he leans in to kiss me. Then I get out and head for the house, cutting across my lawn diagonally to the door. All the cars are parked in the driveway- the whole family's home, and Peter pulls out, passing slowly as I slip inside, only waving to him with a quick glance over my shoulder.

I hear the TV mumbling and my mother calls to me. "Hey, Kayla, come in here."

They're all sprawled out on the couches. Even my dad's home. He's sitting, sunk back into his seat, little eyes on the TV. He doesn't even look over to see me, the news is more interesting- someone got shot. Gabriella turns to stare at me, her eyes are big and waiting to hear what I have to say. "Where were you all day?" My mother is as eager to hear this as Gabriella.

"I was just out," I said. "I was hanging out with my friends."

"Alyssa?" My mother asks. She always has to know.

"Yeah," I said. Too nervously, so my mother's eyebrows lower in an intrigued sort of way.

Gabriella rolls her eyes at this. "I saw that kid's car," She said. "What's his name again?"

"A boy?" My mother gets excited. She jumps slightly in her seat and looks t ome with a grin. "Who? What's his name?" She is always interested in that stuff. I don't know how she keeps up with Gabriella, but she does. She knows the name of every boy Gabriella goes out with, and knows exactly when they stop going out. She always asks me if Gabriella mentions anything about So-and-so and why she stopped seeing him.

I exhale. Opening my mouth to speak-

"Is he your boyfriend?" My mother says in the same breath as the other questions.

"No," I said. "He's not my boyfriend."

Gabriella rolls her eyes again. She knows Peter's name. She just wants me to say it, so mom can bug me. Why didn't you tell me you had a new boyfriend, Kayla? We should meet him. Invite him over, it doesn't have to be for dinner or anything. I just want to meet him. What does he look like? Does he play sports? She always wants to know if boys plays sports. She loves athletes, then it's easier to ask how they are. She can go: "So, how is the football team doing?" She doesn't care about sports, they mean as much to her as the person on the news who has been shot, but she just likes to have something to ask whoever it is. Plus, athletes can talk about sports for literally hours. All she does is have to look interested and sound like she knows what she's talking about.

"What's his n_a_me?" She asks again. She sees mee giving Gabriella a look, and knows I won't answer any of those questions.

My shoulders drop. "His name's Peter," I said.

"How long have you been going out?" She asks me. "You've never mentioned a Peter."

"We're not going out, we just hang out sometimes."

"Is he cute?"

"Mom-"

"What? I'm allowed to ask, aren't I?"

"He's dorky," Gabriella says, remembering him perfectly now. "Really skinny, glasses, but yeah, I guess he's cute-"

I don't have to hear this. I don't want my mom to know about Peter. She's going to work day and night to get him over to our house and to find out every detail of our relationship. She'll smother me with sex talks and questions about his background. She'll see his glasses and his clothing and wonder about him. Then she'll tell me I was better off with Bryce. She loved Bryce. He played sports. Peter does not. I start to turn, to go hide in my room. I'm not as fed up as I make it out to be, but Gabriella rolls her eyes.

"Come on, Kayla," She says smiling.

"Hey, can you keep it down?" My dad speaks suddenly from his chair. He looks at the three of us, and then turns up the volume slightly. More reason for mom to yell to me and screech about Peter. My mom makes a face at my father and looks at me expectantly. I'm pulled back into the room, where I stand in the entrance and look at the three of them. My dad doesn't pay us any attention after that one comment.

"He's not bad-looking," She says. "He's cute."

I squirm, crossing my arms. My mother then asks Gabriella questions, forgetting about me almost completely. So I slip away as they discuss Peter, and how he looks. I catch them calling to me, but I'm halfway up the stairs. They don't even bother with me, which is funny. They let me go upstairs and shower and go to bed. They don't even need me to find out about a boy they've hardly ever met before. The last thing I need is for them to ruin my night.

* * *

Hot days are our busiest. And today, although cooler than the day before, the Shack opens and in about three hours we have extra girls coming in. Harper and Alyssa handle the registers and some scooping, while me and the two extra girls- Amanda and Josie- scoop ice cream. My hands are aching by lunchtime, and I feel new blisters forming. I carry out tub after tub of popular ice cream which is hard as a rock and impossible to scoop. But we have to keep going.

I hear Alyssa talking to Rian, and look up to see the boys all in line. Marcus, Rian, Tyler, and Peter who is glancing down the line for me expectantly. He doesn't see me though, and I can tell. We have all the windows shut so we can have a fan going and some air conditioning, but it's hard to see us scooping ice cream. I look at him, he's wearing just a t-shirt and shorts again. He fixes his glasses and keeps looking. He orders Rocky Road which Alyssa writes quickly on a cup and hands it off to Josie. I don't have to guts to ask her to scoop one cup of ice cream. That'd be weird. I scoop Tyler's, and pass it to Alyssa. Standing behind her, I smile and say hello.

Peter smiles back at me, but not noticeably.

I figure I might as well tell Alyssa, but it's nice as long as she is oblivious. It's funny, actually, especially since we're so obvious.


	18. Chapter 17

_Chapter 17_

I pulled up in front of Rian's house, it wasn't too packed, but I was lucky to get the parking space I did. Then I sat there, looking through my phone. I was trying to decide whether to call Peter or not. If I did, then I could at least kiss him hello and ask him if it was okay if I told Alyssa we were dating. I knew it would be, but I figured I might as well ask him. I saw his number and stared at it. The backlight of my phone died before I could even press call, so I decided he didn't need to come out and get me. I sighed, and looked over at the house as I unbuckled.

It was pretty big, one of the new useless two-story houses that they pack into suburban areas. It was salmon colored, a color his mom probably chose, and had white shutters and flower boxes outside every window. One time me and Alyssa, Rian, and Bryce went up to his room to hang out and even Rian's window had flowers outside of it. I couldn't see Rian ever watering them, but I didn't say anything. The garage door was open, and Marcus was smoking with Mary Ellis and some other kids. I hadn't seen Mary Ellis a lot actually since Peter and I started dating. She was busy most of the night we hung out in groups, but I wanted to say hello to her.

I got out of the car and started walking across the lawn. I was wearing flip flops so my feet got wet. They must water their lawn. And my jeans got wet too. It was the gross kind of wet too, I could tell when I was only halfways across the lawn. I just sighed though, and hoped my whole pant-leg wasn't wet. That's the thing with people whose parents are avid gardeners. They water everything, and you end up getting soaked because of it. Mary Ellis say me and waved, so I went up to her. She exhaled her smoke when I was within five feet of her. She always looked so cool when she smoked, when she wanted to she could blow little smoke rings. Marcus taught her to. I'm too scared to smoke. My great uncle died of lung cancer.

"Hey," She said stepping away from the ring of smokers. "What's up? I haven't seen you all week."

I smiled. "Yeah," I said. "I know. Nothing much, what about you?"

She had her hair pulled back a little. Just the top half. Gabriella wears her hair like that a lot, but Mary Ellis' hair was perfect for it. Her hair was nicely curly, not slightly wavy like mine or Gabriella's. She smiles at me. "I heard about you and Peter," She said smiling. "I think it's really great, he's had a crush on you for so long."

"Oh," I felt myself get kind of awkward. I wasn't used to other people knowing, and I didn't even really know they did. I smiled a little, awkwardly shifting my weight. "Yeah-"

She looked behind her suddenly. "He was just out here, I think," She said. "But he might have just gone inside. I'm not really sure." I looked behind her too, I knew some of the people Marcus was talking to, but not many of them. Alyssa didn't like them. They smoked too much for her. She looked back at me, opening her mouth to say something, but Marcus cut in.

"Hey, Kayls," He says. Nobody calls me 'Kayls' except for Marcus and maybe my little cousins. I smiled a little and wave to him, he takes this oppurtunity to wrap his arms around Mary Ellis' waist and to tickle her. I watch them for a second, until he looks back to me. "Where've you been?"

"I had to wait for my car," I said pointly behind me quickly.

"I could have driven you," He said. "I picked up Petey too. Why didn't you call me? We would have gotten you?"

"Well, I had to close the Shack too, so I just figured I could just get the car if I could," I said. Really, I took any oppurtunity to drive the car. I loved taking the car, it was pretty new and it was always neat. I liked driving it, and knowing it was mine. But I knew that wasn't much of a reason. So I smiled, and watched Mary Ellis kiss Marcus underneath the jaw quickly. He rolled his eyes at me. "Petey's inside," He said. "If you're looking for him." He added this with a grin and a nod.

I laughed, rolling my eyes a little. Mary Ellis elbowed him playfully, and turned to puish him off of her. "I'll see you guys later," I said softly. I didn't want to go, but I wanted to see Peter. I was laways excited to see him now. Mary Ellis said goodbye to me, and Marcus turned back into the group. I crossed the dull grey garage, over to a littly staircase leading into a finished basement. There were cartons of ginger ale and Coke all along the steps, which I had to step over sometimes.

There were people scattered all over the place. I heard some guys playing ping-pong in one room. They were yelling and bumping against the sheets hanging up around it to keep ping pongs from nailing everyone else in the head. I looked around, looking for Peter. I saw the top of his head, he was on the couch with some people. I started over there, but Alyssa saw me.

"Kay-la!" She screeched. She screeches when she's drunk. She was smiling so big her eyes were squinting, and she rushed over to me almost jumping on me. "H-e-e-ey!" She wrapped her arms around my waist in an awkward hug. Everyone must have been tuning her out- even Peter- because he didn't even turn his head. He hadn't heard her for some reason.

"Hey," I said. "Are you having fun?"

"Yes," She said giggling. "What about you? Are y_o_u having fun?"

"Yeah," I said. I looked around. She took this oppurtunity to lean in to me. I could smell the cherry rum on her breath before, but now it almost made me drunk to smell the drafts of it nailing my profile. She cupped her hand to my ear, pressing too hard on my cheek for it to seem at all normal.

"I blew Rian five minutes ago,"

"Okay," I said, inching away suddenly. She giggled and leaned onto me, and pressed her drink- which was splashing onto the floor- to her forehead. Everything was funny to her. She leaned back and looked at me. "Tyler looks so hot tonight." She said. "You should hook up with him." I started to shake my head- "No. No, no, look at him- Ty! Tyler! Come here, I want to show Kayla something."

That got some people's attention- Peter being one of them. He turned and looked at me, raising his eyebrows and smiling a little. Tyler was at the outskirts of the ping pong game, and only gave Alyssa a dirty look and disappeared behind the sheets. "Tyler, wait," She screeched. I grabbed her hand loosely.

"Alyssa," I said. She turned and looked back at me.

"What?"

"Don't get Tyler."

"Ohmigod. Are you hooking up with Bryce again?"

"No-"

"Did you and Bryce finally do it?"

"No,"

The fact that she was screeching was starting to bug me. Especially with Peter probably half-listening. He had turned away, but I knew he was still listening. Or I figured he would be. And I didn't want everyone to know I even hooked up with Bryce once. And I didn't want anyone to think I slept with anyone.

"Then what?"

"Nothing, I just-"

"Fuck," She said covering her mouth, she was surprised. "You didn't sleep with someone else did you?"

"No," I sighed. I saw Peter looking at me, getting up slowly and trying to see if I can go talk to him. I made eye-contact with him, and he tucked his hands into his jean pockets taking slow steps towards the room they keep drinks. "I haven't slept with anyone. Stop, go find Rian."

"No, I wanna hang out with you." She said, pushing her lower lip out in a false sad face. I gave her a look. "Are you mad at me, Kayla?"

"No," I said. She always asks me that when she's drunk. If I'm mad at her. I saw Peter looking around, trying not to look suspicious. I dropped my shoulders, and exchanged a look with him. She turned suddenly. Looking at Peter. "Ohmigod, no." She turned to me. "You're fucking Peter aren't you?"

I felt my back get hot, and my cheeks burned slightly. This was it. I had to get it over with. Telling her now, when she's drunk, would actually be easier. If she was sober she would be a bitch. But drunk she was jsut surprised. She wasn't mad at all, she stared at me, her eyes were wide and her mouth hung open. She was geuinely suprised by this.

"No," I said flatly. We weren't a secret anymore. Well, it's not like we were a secret. But Alyssa finally knew.

"Oh, good," She sighed. As a drunk person, she was pretty with it, but she let go of things easily. She leaned onto me giggling a little, at the ubsurdity of me and Peter being anything more than friends. And that bugged me. The fact that she'd laugh at the idea of me and Peter being together.

"Hey, Alyssa," I said. "Wait."

She looked at me, trying not to giggle. "Me and Peter are dating though." I said.

"What?"

"We've been hanging out and now we're sort of together."

"No, stop kidding me."

"I really like him." My voice was small.

"You would have told me,"

"I didn't want to. You already were treating me funny."

I was more comfortable telling her when she was drunk, she was reacting better. She looked at Peter. "But he's such a dork."

He looked at me, his eyes widening. He hadn't expected me to tell her right now. She looked at me, narrowing her eyes. She didn't get it, but I figured I'd let it sit. "No he's not." I said. "But, I'll see you in a little while. I want to get something to drink." I started walking to Peter, waving back at her. He watched me, and I smiled a little. He looked beyond me at Alyssa. I peeked back, she was staring at us. Confused.

I went over, and stepped past Peter into the room where they kept the drinks. "Hi," I said. I turned as I said this and he almost bumped into me.

"Oh-" I kissed him. It was quick. He pulled away. "Did you tell her?"

I nodded, and he smiled a little. We kept walking over to the table and got drinks. There was barely anyone in the room. I wasn't in the mood for drinking anything tonight, so I poured a can of Coke into one of those plastic red cups. Then I looked over at Peter and saw him mimic me. I smiled a little to myself, and moved over to him. I slid in between him and the table and kissed him.

He smiled a little when we pulled away. "Now you can kiss me whenever you want," I said softly. He smiled, and kissed me softly on the lips. We then took our Cokes and went outside to sit somewhere. We just talked and sipped out sodas. He touched my knees as we leaned together like two little kids with a secret. But now everyone was going to know. I didn't mind it as much as I thought I would. It was going to happen eventually.

I couldn't wait until he was my boyfriend.


	19. Chapter 18

_Chapter 18_

I woke up with a voicemail from Alyssa. I had seen that I had one, and immediately called to see if it was Peter. I had dropped him off at home last night instead of Marcus. We were happy, and last night we didn't talk about much of anything: we didn't even bring up Alyssa once we left the basement into the backyard. I think that was a good thing too, because if we had I would have gotten nervous. I knew she was going to be mad at me- she hated Peter- but I didn't really want to think about it.

She sounded sober, starting out with a friendly tone. "Hey Kayla, it's me... Alyssa," I waited, cringing waiting for her to switch tones and start talking fast and angrily. But she maintained this nice tone. "I know you're not working tomorrow, and I wanted to know if you wanted to hang out or something. I'll drive by around noon and see if you're home, and we can... I don't know, just get food or something or even go to the Sharon Mall. Anways, I'll see you then. Bye-"

I listened to to it twice, and then just sat there. I don't know why I did it, but I saw she would come by in around an hour, so I showered and pulled my hair back and got dressed. I went downstairs and started waiting. I would like to think I had some weird necessary need to stick up for myself and for Peter, but really I did it because she told me too. And I knew that. Even as I saw her car pulling up. I didn't want to go, I had to.

She never drives anywhere. But today, because she wanted to make sure I would go with her, she borrowed her mother's car and showed up. She's a great driver too, except she hates having to do it. I walked across my lawn, smiling and waving a little. She rolls down her window and takes off her sunglasses, smiling at me with her perfect smile. It's striking how much she looks like a car commercial right now in her little red car and the perfect California look. I smile back a little too, trying not to seem awkward.

"Hey," She says, and I open the door and get in.

Then without much else, we head off to the mall. Like Best Friends in movies.

* * *

The mall isn't crowded, it's hot out and nobody is really in the mood to shop. Today isn't a special day or anything, just a random weekday in the Summer. All of the stores she picks are basically empty. She knows a lot of the kids who work there, just as long as they go to our school. Everyone else she just smiles at and says she doesn't need their help. The guys check her out, and she loves it. Making faces about it, like these guys are just t_oo _irratating. But she loves it.

I just go through the racks and never see anything I like. None of these places are my stores. We do go into one in the middle, but I don't like anything. Sequins and neon colors are in this season, for some reason. I'm too pale for both of them. I'm not freakishly pale, but still never tan enough to pull off a lime green pair of shorts. Nor do I have any desire to try.

"You should have heard Rian last night," She said. "He was so sloppy and cheesy, it as adorable. He kept saying how perfect we are for each other, and how he's so happy he asked me out. I mean, when you think about it, Rian was the last person I'd ever consider dating. Especially after Ross, I mean, you know how much I loved Ross. He was like my Bryce. And then Rian just comes along, and we're not perfect or anything, but we go together somehow. It's some weird opposites attract type of thing."

Who would buy lime green shorts? Not even Alyssa would. And she wore a bright high-lighter pink glistening dress to the semi-formal last year. Maybe the girls in my grade who draw Anime. But then again, I think these shorts might just be for strange impulse. Someone might walk by them, and wish they could wear them. They're pick them up and realize that -yes- they're the same brand as their favorite pair of black shorts. And the same size. They'll flip them over in their hands and consider them. Then just decide: Today's the day. I'm going to reinvent myself. I'm going to be the one to wear these lime green shorts.

"Hey, Kayla- what about this top? It's cute, right?"

"Definitely."

"How much would you pay for it?"

"I don't know, probably like, twelve."

"It's thirteen,"

"If you like it you should get it."

"I love it."

"Then get it."

"Okay, I will."

But then, you have to stop and realize how weird you'll look when you buy the lime green shorts and nothing else. So maybe you need to get something else with it. Just to even it out. So you should buy the skirt you saw some girl wearing the other day. It's in your size too, and you did think it would look good with that shirt with the flowers on it. So you buy it too. Then you see the sales corner and pick out some other things. And the lime green shorts are sandwiched in the middle. You look at the clump of hangers and can just see the corner poking out, but you feel pretty excited about it. You are actually doing it. You're buying those damn lime green shorts, no matter what anyone else says. Screw them all, you want them.

"Hey, Kayla,"

I look up at her, and she has stopped going through the rack, and is looking at my sympathetically. Her heads tipped to the side and she's frowning a little. I turn and move over to her rack so she'll talk to me.

"I remember what you said to me," She said. "About you and Peter. And I just want you to know that I'm happy for you... as long as you're happy." The way she says it. "I know you and Tyler jus broke up, but if you're trying to make him jealous or something, I think it's really stupid. Especially since you broke up with him and everything. I talked to him a few nights ago and he said he'd get back together with you if that's what you're doing."

I stop and look at her. "Wait-" I said.

"But if you are trying to make Tyler jealous," She said, smiling a litte and chuckling. "I don't know why you'd pick Peter of all people."

"I'm not trying to make Tyler jealous," I said softly. I smile a little too, maybe she knows how absurd the idea is. That's why she's laughing. Because this is all so silly.

"Oh, okay," She said smiling, and nodding. "I just wanted to make sure." She looked at me them, kind of sideways. Then went back to the rack. I smile a little, and keep looking. There isn't anything I like on this rack either, it's all sequins. I don't even like sequins, but I keep looking. Maybe I will like something here.

"Did Peter finally tell you?"

I look up, her voice is sharp. She's smiling a little though, in a sappy way, but her smile isn't as perfect as she thinks it is. I shake my head, "I don't think so."

"I mean," She goes back to thumbing through the lose. "He's been in love with you for forever. All the guys knew it, and I figured he told you. Rian told me after I asked him about you and Peter. So I figured that might be why, you know. That's how Rian and I started. He guilted me into going on a date with him, but I was lucky, I guess. With a guy like Rian."

I stare at her, and shake my head. "Um, no," I say quickly, my voice tumbling out as a nervous laugh. "Actually, I told him I liked him first."

She looked up, her neck snapping to attention. "When?"

"Uh," I say. She's not acting sweet anymore. "The night I told Tyler we should stop seeing each other."

She raised her eyebrows. "When was that?"

She knows. She knows exactly when, she just wants me to go into it more. But I shrug. "You know, just at that party, we started talking."

"But you were with me most of the night."

"No,"

"Oh,"

I wait, but she doesn't say anything for a while. I swallow and go onto another rack. Then I act stupid. I go with her to the dressing room and talk her into buying the shirt she really likes. She then buys it and we walk out of the store and go get smoothies somewhere. Not even frozen yogurt smoothies, the fruit kind. Mine's okay, but it doesn't taste like real fruit. It's more sugar than anything, but Alyssa makes me taste hers because it's so good.

She only brings up Peter one more time: "What did he do about Julia?"

"He just stopped seeing her, I guess."

"Huh,"

"I mean, they never really dated or anything."

"Yeah, I guess."

"Yeah, he told me so."

She nods, sipping her smoothie. "Shit, this is so good." She says.


	20. Chapter 19

_Chapter 19_

By the end of the shopping trip, I felt horrible. My stomach felt like it was turning into gellitin, and that feeling was beginning to run up my throat. I don't know why this is even happening to me, she hasn't been mean to me, or Peter. She doesn't even bring him up when she talks about going over Tyler's tomorrow, and goes through the list of people and names that will be there. I sit there in the front seat thinking about him. I just want to talk to him. Not about this. Anything, just to feel better. I don't know if I've been actually getting sick, but I couldn't make any sense of what I was going through.

"Gabriella's home," She said loudly, pulling in front of my house. "Je-sus. What the fuck- the one time I have to go to work, she's here. Well, tell her I said 'Hello' and that I miss her. I haven't seen her in forever, I'll stop by soon-" I open the door and get out onto the street. My knees are wobbley. "See you Kayla, this was fun today. You know, I miss this. If I have to hang out with Julia one more time, I'm going to kill myself. I'll text you tonight-" I nod smiling, and wave as I shut the door. She smiles back and waves and lets me make it to the lawn before she's off again.

I get to the porch and lower myself down onto the steps. I pick my phone out of my small bag and go through all the contacts to his name. I'm surprised he hasn't called me or texted me, but I have to talk to him. The rings are short and I feel myself perking up. Then he answers. "Hey," He says. I love his voice on the phone. I had heard it before we were together, but now it was different. He was happier when he talked to me, and his voice was more sure. "What's up?"

"Hi, nothing-"

"I'm sorry," He says suddenly; he'll never miss an oppurtunity to apologize. "I called you today but your phone was busy, so I hung up. I was going to text you, but my grandmother has this huge benefit tonight, and my mom's stressing out over it. My suit-coat wasn't fitting right, and it was this huge problem-" He sounds happy, and is laughing a little, expecting me to. I smile with him, because he's cute when he's like this, and I can just see him talking to me about all of this. I sit back and look out across my lawn.

"I didn't know you had this huge benefit," I said smiling. "Geez, I should have gotten a hold of you earlier to see where you could squeeze me into you're benefit-ridden life."

"I tried to call you," He says. "We could have met up this morning or something and gotten breakfast. I should have asked you last night, but I didn't think of it until I was up and realized my mom was hyperventilating in the kitchen over Nate's hair." I laughed, and he laughed with me. He was so happy. Then I waited for him to say what I has expected him to eventually. "What did you do today?"

I lean onto my elbows, tucking a hand behind my hair. iI had no reason to lie, but I had the initial need to. I swallowed and squeezed my neck. What if he reacted badly? He wouldn't, I had to trust him with this."I went to the mall," I said. "With Alyssa."

"Oh," He said. "Cool." His voice was sharper then, he was trying to sound happy and okay with it, but he feels the same way I do right now admitting it.

"She's terrible," I said softly. "And she kept me there so long, I didn't have a chance to call you today, and catch you before they fixed you suit-coat." I wait, but he doesn't let a pause take over. He jumps in and casually asks me about the afternoon, and I tell him she didn't say anything awful about us. "I'm sorry about all of this stuff with her." I said weakly. "I don't know why I'm so paranoid about it. I mean... she can't do anything about us being together."

"Yeah," He said.

"And we both like each other," I said. "Wait, are there going to be girls there tonight?"

He laughs quietly. "You know," He says, kidding. "A lot my my grand-mother's friends' granddaughters. A lot of them are models."

I smile, laughing sincerely at this, and he laughs with me. "Well, then," I said. "I guess Alyssa won't have to worry about us anymore."

He laughs. "I've met them all," He said. "They've got nothing on you."

I smile, and every bad thing inside of me is washed out. My heart is racing. I try to think of something to say, but then I hear someone talking to him in the background. I'm not sure who it is, but I had heard his brother talking a couple of times. I even talked to him once, when he stold Peter's phone. But it doesn't sound like Nathan, so I wait. Maybe it's his father. It's too mumbled and quiet for me to make anything out, so I wait. My my free hand slides down to my ankle. "Do you have to go?"

"Yeah," His voice has gone flat. "But I'll call you tonight. These things get over early, and I can probably get wicked early anyways. We could go driving around or something, whatever." I must have paused too long, because he jumps in getting nervous again. "I mean, if you want to."

"I'd like that," I say smiling.

"Okay then," He said. "I'll-"

"Wear your suit-coat when we go out."

"No," He said. "I look like a dork in it."

"Please,"

"No way," He says, and I can hear him softly laughing through the phone, just by the sound of short clous of air filling his reciever.

I laugh. "I'll talk to you later,"

"Cool, yeah," He says. "See you."

I hang up first, because usually he won't. Once I waited a little while, and noticed he was still there. We both laughed about it. It wasn't a creepy thing. He was just there, sitting on the phone until he knew I was gone. For a few seconds I sat there on the porch after shutting my phone. I was tired after today, and felt sluggish. Too sluggish to get up and go inside. It was hot out, and eventually the heat was too much so I had to go inside.

It was awkward, because I could hear them fighting. They were in her room, and the door was probably open. Her voice was fast and sharp, I couldn't hear anything she was saying but it made its way downstairs. Then he interrupted her. Answering her with a loud, irritated tone. I stood there at the door for a while, listening. I had heard them fighting before, but they always became aware of me and stopped or quieted down. Today they didn't. Gabriella kept going, and all I could do was go into the living room and lay there, trying to make out what was going on.


	21. Chapter 20

_Chapter 20_

Peter was funny when he was drunk. He didn't do much of anything, he'd stare off at the walls, or look at someone specifically- usually someone he didn't know too well. And that was it. When you talked to him, he'd giggle and talk back. He didn't like to smoke weed, and rarely ever got drunk, but tonight he did by accident because he mixed his cup up with someone else's. The guys always teased him about being a "light-weight," but I always thought he was entertaining. I drank a little more than usual too, and sat with him in Tyler's basement.

"Hey, Peter," I said leaning in, pulling my feet up on the couch. "Are you okay?"

He moved his head back and forth, I guessed that was a yes. "Peter?" I said, and he looked at me. And smiled a little, not showing his teeth. "I'm good," He said. He moved his hand lazily over my knee and tried to touch it but just tickled me. I smiled, laughing at him. I always got really bubbly when I was a little drunk. "Don't drink anymore." I said, leaning onto the couch. He leaned his head back with mine, and laughed at me. I don't know why this was so cute to me, especially since I had been used to talking to Drunk Peter, me and Marcus usually drove him home even before we spoke much, and he found it easier to talk to me when he was like this.

"Your hair looks nice," He said.

I giggled. "Your hair looks nice, too," I said. I didn't know if I was the weird one, or he was; but he smiled, and did the thing again to my knee. I looped my fingers in between his. And he leaned in to kiss me. He broke off laughing, and I couldn't help but laugh at him. He lay back, and a hand moved over his stomach, which he rubbed. Then he rolled his eyes over to me. "Hey," He said. "You know what I was thinking?"

"What?"

"It's been three weeks now," He said. "That we've been... you know-" He broke off giggling again. He looked up at the ceiling, and I had to bite my knuckle to keep from laughing at him too much. If you laughed too much he got embarrassed. Then he looked over at me, squeezing my fingers in his. He leaned in to kiss me again, and I tried not to be the one to pull away. We didn't like to kiss in front of anyone, because usually people yelled things at us to embarrass Peter or me. He pulled away quickly, figuring someone would notice. But no one did.

He leaned in again to kiss me, only a short time. "Hey," He said. "Let's be alone." I giggled and he slowly got up- he moved so slowly- pulling me with him. We didn't have anywhere really to go, but he kept telling me he'd find somewhere. He settled with the laundry room, and we went in. If we both hadn't been kind of drunk, we both wouldn't have done this, but it seemed fun. I closed and locked the door and he fell over something. But he just laughed. I went to go find him in the dark- because the only light came in through a little window that made the room look blue. He was curled up in a shadow laughing half-silently.

* * *

He sat in the backseat of Marcus' car with me. There was no lawn mower and he insisted on sitting on the floor in between the two seats, because Mary Ellis got one and he made me take the other. He wasn't feeling well, you could tell, and so he leaned his head onto my lap and I ran my fingers through his hair and touched his shoulders. I felt kind of gross too, but I didn't want to show it, because I didn't know if he was feeling this way for the same reasons. Mary Ellis and I talked a little, but she was sleepy. Then in front Rian and Marcus aren't talking. It's all extremely quiet, and a long ride, because Marcus probably doesn't was Peter to throw up on his floor.

When I look down at Peter, he's asleep. His eyes are closed, but he looks like he feels sick. His mouth is making this weird shape, and his eyebrows are going downwards. I don't think he's really sick, but he might be. He didn't say anything to me. But that just makes me more nervous. What if he's thinking about it? I trust that he's asleep or passed out. I don't have the heart to wake him up to make sure he's still alive, but he wasn't drunk enough to black out or anything. I sit back and glance out the window, realizing how late it is. There are literally no lights on in the whole town it seems, and the car's quietness takes it all a step further. There is no one and nothing in the whole town.

Mary Ellis gets in front, but I let Peter stay where he is. When I pinch his shoulder, he just mumbles something and brushes me away.

"Where did Alyssa go?" Mary Ellis asks no one in particular.

Marcus turns off the road, heading to my or Peter's house. "She's fucking Tyler." He said.

"What?" Mary Ellis says, thinking the same thing I am. Alyssa never cheats on anyone, not unless she has a good reason to. And with Rian, I don't understand any good reason. But I turn towards them and listen.

"Rian doesn't know," He said. "But I saw them when Rian went to take a piss or something, and he was all over her and was trying to shove his hands down her pants. I don't know. I bet she is. I mean, for chrissakes she pushed Rian into the fucking car. The dude was stoned enough to not even notice too. Fuck it, you know, they're all shitty people. I don't get it." What Marcus just said sits in the car for a while. "Does anyone want a burger or something? I'm starving." He pulls into a fast food place, and Mary Ellis says she would like something small. She turns to me, "Kayla?" Like I wasn't even listening.

"No thanks," I say softly. "I'll stay with him."

Marcus pulls into a spot, and then get out. Mary Ellis is really nice, she offers to bring me food out here, but I tell her softly that it's fine. I'm not feeling so well. "Cheap booze," Marcus says. And he starts saying how cheap Tyler is, how he can't even buy "the good fucking booze" to which Mary Ellis just shakes her head and smiles back at me. I smile too, and watch them walk up to get something quick. I look back at Peter, and he's looking more awake.

"Hey," I said. I nudge the back of his neck, and he starts to lift his head up, blinking and looking around. He leans back into the other seat and rubs his eyes.

"Home?"

"No. Are you hungry?"

He looks around, his hand back to his stomach, and he rubs it. I never have seen him do this, but I guess that it means he's still a little buzzed. He must have been more drunk than I thought. "No," He said. "I feel pretty gross." Then he looks up at me, his head crunching against the arm-rest, and his smile curves into a sad little sympathetic line. Almost a smile. He looks down. "Are you okay?" He asks.

"Me?"

"Yeah,"

"Of course, why wouldn't I be?"

He shrugged. "Are we okay?"

I knew what he meant. "Yeah," I said. "Do you think so?"

He nodded. "If you do,"

I nod, and pull my feet up on the seat to face him more. It feels funny looking down at him so I lean more onto the arm-rest. We're so close, I don't understand how he's packed into such a tight space. "I mean, I didn't want to go _that_ fast," He says. "With us, you know."

"I know,"

"And I've never... done that stuff before."

I felt incredibly awkward, and realized this once he said that. We had never been so awkward before, but the conversation was inevitable. I rested my chin on the arm-rest. I looked down. "You know, I haven't either." I said softly. He looked at me, not surprised or anything. He just looked at me softly. And he nodded a little, his eyebrows going down. I looked at him. "We were both drunk, so it's not that big of a deal. We don't have to rush anything."

He nodded softly, looking at me. Then he smiled a little. "I really like you, Kayla," He said. I smiled back at him in the same way. I would have said more, but I could hear Mary Ellis and Marcus coming up around the car. When Marcus opened the door, Peter got up and sat down in the seat, stretching out his legs in a quick moment. Mary Ellis came in and offered a bag of food to us. She had taken her burger out and was unwrapping it for a bite. I took a few fries, and ate them, and Peter took one, but I saw him starting to look sick again. It made me feel better that he hadn't been so bothered by our rushing a little, that he had really been feeling sick. But I reached over and squeezed his hand, feeling how short a distance was in between us now. He smiled and our fingers laced together lazily. He leaned against the window, looking at me sometimes. I smiled at him softly, and kissed him goodbye when we dropped him off.

"I'll call you tomorrow," He said softly to me while Marcus quickly stomached half of a onion cheese-burger. The smell wafted through the air, and I saw him try not to breathe it in. I smiled. "Sure, I don't have to work." He opened his door.

"Oh, you don't?" He said. "We could just hang out, if you want. You could even come over my house, I don't think anyone'll be home." He got out of the car, watching me.

"Yeah," I said. "Sure, what time?"

"Whenever," He said, but stopped himself. "How about noon or one or something."

"Noon's good."

"Okay, yeah," He smiled. "I'll see you then."

"Night, Peter," Mary Ellis said looking over her shoulder at him.

"See you," He closed the door, and I watched him walking up to his front door. We hung outside for a few minutes, I could see a light turn on, and figured that was his room. Marcus kept eating, not too quickly, but was almost done. Then the light went out, and Mary Ellis passed me some soda. I smiled, and thanked her. She started talking to me and Marcus, but about nothing important. I didn't have to say much, because once Marcus had to start driving he started to rant. I don't know how he and Mary Ellis ever get to any common ground, because for the most part they seem so different. She's so quiet when he goes off on these tangents. I don't know how anyone could love someone like that, because I didn't know anyone he didn't talk about in a bad way- except for maybe Peter. And Mary Ellis, of course. But she just sits there, sticking her own thoughts in between his. It's fun to listen to sometimes, so maybe to them that's what it's like. When they dropped me off, I was stuck with a bag of fries and waved back at them before they drove off.

I was feeling better, and walking into the house there was no noise or lights on. I went into the kitchen and flipped a switch, flooding the downstairs with the bright flourescent lights. I ate my fries- now cooling- with cold ketchup from the fridge. My house didn't creak, and I couldn't hear a single word. I went up to my room when I finished and dressed in my pajamas. I wasn't that tired, and I didn't have to wake up early, so I lay down on my bed and stared at the ceiling. I was so bored and sleepless, I decided to take a shower.

Sometimes you have nothing better to do.


	22. Chapter 21

_Chapter 21_

Going to Peter's, I was pretty nervous. Not because of him, but because I hadn't been to his house yet- and I have never been there alone. I began to get stressed about his mother answering the door, and what I'd say. He never had to meet my parents, but now I was risking meeting his. I pulled up out front and parked in his driveway behind his station wagon. The only other car was a jeep, which I took as a good sign, because I was sure that belonged to his step-brother, who I had never met in person. I might have once, or someone said I did, but I don't remember him, and I guessed it was a while ago. I had walked up to his house before, but here I was, alone. I went up the stairs and knocked quietly.

His house wasn't huge, but it was about the size of mine. I could hear the TV on inside, but no one talking. I didn't expect him to be waiting by the stairs for me, so after a few minutes I knocked again. He might have not heard me over the TV. And there was no doorbell- well there was one, but it was broken. I knew that from the last time I went over, and Rian had to call Peter to tell him we were over.

"Just get in here. I'm not going to hold the door open for you. Do it yourself, lazy-ass."

I felt my cheeks burn, and I didn't know whether to turn around or listen to whoever said this to me. It wasn't Peter, I figured. Then I could heard him rushing down the stairs loudly, and the door opened quickly. He didn't have glasses on, and his face was desperately sympathetic. "I am so sorry," He said quickly.

"Oh shit-"

I never saw Peter get angry at anyone. He turned sharply, holding the door, and looking at Nathan who was now standing in the little opening and hallway. "Why didn't you wake me up?"

Nathan was tall, much taller than both me and Peter. He was about Marcus' height, maybe a little more. But if I had known him, he looked extremely different because I had never seen him before in my life. He was in basket-ball shirts and a plain black t-shirt. He was kind of skinny, but was too tall for him to look that skinny. He had these big clear blue eyes, that stared in between me and Peter in an embarrassed shock. He had long hair, pulling back into a pony-tail and he had a choppy scruffy beard growing. He looked at me finally. "I did not know if was you, I swear." He said.

I was frozen standing at the door, not knowing what to say out of embarrassment. Peter lifted his hand and dropped it. "I told you to wake me up a half hour ago," He said. He reached his hand back up, he looked so pissed off. "I told you I was having someone over too, and I wanted you to wake me up. Why didn't you wake me up? I told you the exact time and everything, I didn't ask you to do anything but this. What..." His voice trailed away, and he turned to me. "I am so sorry."

"It's okay," I said, but my voice was light.

Nathan's hand was now on his forehead, like he just remembered something. "Dude, I forgot," He said, and he looked at me. "Jack was supposed to be here in an hour, and I thought you were him. I totally lost track of time, I am so sorry- you must think I am the biggest asshole in the world-"

Peter stepped out of the way for me to come in, and closed the door behind me. He looked tired, but his cheeks had been red from yelling at Nathan. He exhaled, pointing upstairs. "I have to get my glasses, but if you want to come upstairs, you can," He said. I was still a little shocked and embarrassed. My cheeks still burned under my skin, and I looked at him with my eyes widened. I wanted to go upstairs, because I wanted to just get out of this room.

"No girls upstairs," Nathan said. I looked at him and he was leaning against the wall. He crossed his arms too, grinning at Peter in a mischeivous way. I touched my neck, and Peter shot Nathan a look. "Ma's going to flip out if I tell her you had a girl up in your love cave." Peter was getting irritated again, but he looked at me sadly.

"I'll be right back." He said and he ran up the stairs, taking them three at a time. I was left with Nathan.

I looked around awkwardly, not knowing if I could move or do anything. I didn't want to talk to Nathan, but he stayed where he was. "Tell me this," Nathan said looking at me, all of his embarrassment had evidently melted away. "Are you his girlfriend? He insists you aren't, but he's a lying bastard and I don't trust him." He had changed so much, and all I could do was stare at him blankly for a second, touching my hair.

"Oh, no," I said. "We're not official."

"Yet?" He said this, leaning in quickly.

I smiled, nervously. "Yet."

"His glasses are downstairs," He said leaning back looking up, there was a thlunking noise. I smiled, laughing a little at this, but I just felt extremely awkward. He pushed off of the wall. "Would you like a sandwich?"

"Oh, no, thank you," I said. My voice was really high-pitched like I was talking to Someone I Didn't Know Very Well's parents. He rolled his eyes. "Don't give me that," He said. "Come on, I'll get you something. It's lunchtime, you look like you haven't eaten for half of your life." He didn't wait for me to decline again, and started for the kitchen. I looked back up to Peter, but followed Nathan anyways. In the kitchen he ushered me to sit down at the table, right in front of Peter's glasses.

"Hey!" Peter yelled. "Are my glasses down there?"

"Haven't seen 'em." Nathan shouted up.

"Are you sure?"

"Pre-tty sure," Nathan went into the fridge. "We have pizza, are you Italian?"

"No,"

He took out a plate of pizza. "Not Italian? You look Italian. I could see you on the Italian country-side or something. Not in like Caesar's Empire, but the places where movie-star-chicks go to find themselves." He put the plate of about seven slices of pizza within reach for me, and went back to the fridge. I blushed again, feeling my back get hot. I should have worded my answer better. "With the rolling grape trees, and stuff." I smiled a little crossing my arms and pinching my elbow. He went back to the fridge and took out a loaf of bread, and a chicken wrapped in tinfoil. A full one too, not even a left-over one. "Why didn't you go to the American Revolution Money For Troops Thing with him?"

I didn't know what he meant. And stared at him helplessly. He got a knife and fork out of a drawer and walked over, sitting down across from me. "The Benefit-thing," He said. Then he dropped his shoulders. "He didn't tell you about it, huh?" Instantly I shook my head. "Oh, no," I said "I didn't know about it until that afternoon."

He shook his head, making a face. "My mother told him specifically," He took chicken and began to carve it. "_And_ me too, but I'm taking a break from you women-folk... nothing personal, you know, I just need to get back in touch with my masculinity. Some chicks," He dropped his hands onto the table, each clutching the fork and knife. "Seriously they're mentally unstable. Don't get crazy, Girlfriend, I'm telling you." He went back to carving, pointing the tip of the knife at me. "There's a reason why some of them end up forty and alone with their cats." He shook his head and went back to his sandwich. "Anyways, my mother was pushing him to ask a nice girl to come to these parties with him, and I tell him, too, but you know him..." I smiled, reaching out and playing with Peter's glasses. I needed something to fiddle with.

He took out a piece of bread and put it right on the table, and started to pile chicken onto it. "So," He said. "Fill me in. Are you guys an item?"

I didn't know what to make of Nathan. He talked so quickly and was all over the place. I picked up the glasses, unfolding them and folding them. "Yeah," I said. "I guess."

"You guess?" He exclaimed. "Come on. My Peter needs a solid woman. He's never made a decision in his life- I need you to make them for him." He leaned in, widening his big blue eyes. "Are you guys an item?"

I laughed anxiously. "Yeah,"

"Good," He said. He went back to carving his chicken. "When did you meet?"

I hesitated, watching him go at the bird. "Three years ago," I said.

He looked at me. "You haven't been an item for three years, have you?"

I shook my head. "No," I laughed again nervously, which sounded inappropriate.

"How long then?" He said, I opened my mouth. "Wait, let me guess..." He sat back, but looked at me. "You haven't touched the pizza, Girlfriend, come on. I told you, you're going to whither away into nothing." He nudged the plate towards me. I smiled a little, but didn't go to take any. The last thing I wanted to eat was pizza. My stomach was a ball of knots. "Let's see," He sat back, and he started to count on his fingers. I heard Peter yell down again, but I couldn't make out what he said, because Nathan came out with his estimated. "Four months," He said. I must have reacted in a shocked way. He made a face, "I was off by a lot, huh? How long has it been?"

"Three weeks," I said smiling.

"Three weeks!" He said. "You're kidding me. I thought you would have said longer than that. J_e_sus. Three week?"

I could hear Peter coming down the stairs. But Nathan leaned forward, shaking his head and sighing. He opened the ceram wrap and pushed the plate of pizza over to me some more. "There is literally every kind of pizza in there," He said. "Just have one slice." Peter came into the kitchen looking at us. "Peter, my boy," Nathan boomed. He had a nice low voice. "We were just discussing this and that." He pointed his carving knife- now back in his hand. "You didn't tell me you and Girlfriend have been a hot item for a mere three weeks."

I thought he had been playing around calling me "girlfriend" as a joke, but I learned he was referring to me as "Girlfriend" like it was my name. I smiled a little, holding up his glasses. Peter took them from me, smiling in an embarrassed way. He looked at Nathan. "You said they weren't down here," He said.

"I said I didn't _see_ them," Nathan corrected him. Then he looked at me, dropping his shoulders, when he saw the plate in front of me. "See, Girlfriend, let me explain this to you. If you don't eat, your cells stop functioning because there is no nutrients going in. And then, when you're cells stop functioning, your organs fail, and I assure you, it is extremely slow and painful, and then Peter is going to flip out and not know what to do, and I'll be playing XBOX and not hear either of you until it's too late. So eat a slice of pizza, or I'm going to have to ask you to leave, because houses decline in Real Estate value every time someone dies under non-freak circumstances."

I smiled, laughing with a little more ease, and Peter just looked at Nathan in disbelief. "Stop," He said. "You're so weird sometimes."

Nathan pointed his knife at him. "But three weeks Peter? I just embarrassed you, and indirectly myself, when I guessed you guys started your smoky young romance four months ago." He said. He sat back, looking at Peter in complete seriousness. "We're brothers, man. It's like I don't even know you." Peter shook his head, and I tried not to laugh.

Peter looked at me. "Do you want to go downstairs?"

"Oh, sure," I said, I went to get up.

"Can't have it," Nathan said swinging the knife in the air. I looked at him. "I'm doing this for your own safety, Girlfriend. I taught my Peter to be a sexy-ass stud, and I don't want him corrupting you. You are both at that time in your lives when you need constant supervision-" Peter stopped him.

"You are literally the weirdest person I know," He said loudly. "How do you ever come up with this stuff?" Peter looked at me, moving his hand lightly to my shoulder. "Come on," He was laughing a little, because what Nathan was saying was absolutely ridiculous.

"Take some pizza, why don't you?" He said. He leaned in to me. "Peter had quite the hangover, and I want to make sure he's recovering."

Peter rolled his eyes and started to walk towards the door to the basement. Nathan kept making his sandwich, with more meat on it that I thought anyone ever normally ate. He shook his head sighing. "I'll see you later, Girlfriend." I smiled and waved back to him.

"Nice meeting you," I said.

Peter opened the door to the basement for me, and followed behind shutting it. We heard Nathan in the kitchen for a few minutes but then his friend actually showed up, and all we heard was feet stomping, because of their video-game. Peter's basement was finished, but pretty empty. There was a mattress over in the corner where Nathan slept most of the time, and then a couch facing an old TV set. Then there was work-out equipment from the 90s, and a brand new pool table. On the walls were posters of demonic Renaissance paintings, which I guess Nathan added. But I had been in the basement before so many times, it was weird to be alone with Peter in it.

We kissed hello, and lay down on the couch together. We weren't as awkward as I thought we would be. I took off his glasses and then we sat in the corner of the huge leather L-shaped couch. We talked for a little while, but he and I were both tired, and started to kiss. Nathan checked on us, by yelling down that our pizza was cold, which Peter ignored. Then there were footsteps coming down. Peter dropped his head onto my shoulder, and I blushed. "Hey, guys," It was Nathan.

"Go away," Peter said sternly. I lay there flat. We weren't doing anything, but it was still embarrassing.

"I'm just getting a beer." He didn't go into a lecture, but went right back upstairs.

I laughed a little blushing. "He's funny," I said softly.

"He's crazy," He said, still annoyed.

"Come on," I smiled. "You were laughing at him too."

"What did he say to you?"

"He said I looked Italian," I smiled, and Peter kissed beneath my jaw. "And that you could have asked me to the Benefit." I smiled a little, but his lips moved away from my skin, and he paused for a second. I didn't mean it the way I sounded. I didn't exactly want to go to that thing. I would have been forced into meeting his family and a bunch of other people, and right now I could barely function in a conversation with his brother.

"I didn't want you to meet me family yet," He said pulling away.

"It's okay," I said.

"Especially Nathan, he likes to get into fights with my grandfather over hippies and stuff..." I laughed, and he smiled. "I'll take you someday."

I smiled. "I'd like that," I kissed him.

He smiled, and kissed me again. He pulled away. "Don't think my whole family is crazy though," He said. "I swear, Nathan was normal before he went to college." I laughed and moved my arms around his neck, pulling him closer to me. It was cool in his basement, and today was one of those days when it was unbearably hot outside. We didn't leave his house until the sun started to go down, and even then it was just to sit in his backyard for a little while.

When the sun went down he walked me to my car and we kissed goodbye. I don't remember ever being so happy in a long time. I smiled at him and told him so, and all he could say was he felt the same. I backed out of his driveway, pausing to wave goodbye to him. He was just a smaller figure, illuminated by the lights of my car. He lifted his hand in a wave, sliding his other one into his pocket. I smiled to myself and started to drive myself home. Today had been perfect to me.


	23. Chapter 22

_Chapter 22_

At home to driveway was empty, and since it was rare for someone to park in the garage without it having been raining, I figured I was going to be home alone. I parked the car closest to the front door, and went in. My mother had bought a ton of frozen dinners- all with bright labels promising some weight loss- but I was fine eating them because they were easy to make, and tasted fine. I hadn't eaten much at Peter's, especially because I felt awkward with Nathan heckling me. He got me to eat a slice of cold pizza, but I could barely eat that much in front of Peter, let alone his brother who loved to tease the both of us.

When I stepped inside, I heard the TV was on, and the lights were out. Gabriella's head was poking out over the top of the couch, and I could see the light of the TV hitting her hair, turning it a light shade of blue in some spots. She was watching a movie, I assumed, but I didn't know which one. I'm not a movie kind of person. "Hi," I said, twirling my keys around my finger, taking a few slow steps into the room. She didn't jump, or turn around to look at me. She just returned a quiet, "Hello."

"What's up?" I said softly. She hadn't bombarded me about the car, or complained yet. Maybe she was in a good mood, but even then she would rarely treat me any different.

"I ordered a pizza," She said, turning her profile into a silhouette as she turned her head in my direction. "There's a lot left if you want some. It's still warm." I stood there, looking at her. I couldn't tell if her eyes were opened, or if her eyelids were covering them, her whole face from my point of view was swallowed by darkness. I walked over in the direction of the kitched, hitting the hall light on my way. The house was dark, but she was home. Everything was wrong; I could feel it.

The box was in the middle of the island, with its bottom edge perfectly parallel to the edge of the marble-top. I went over and lifted the top, peaking in. Touching the crust, it was still warm. I was starving, so I took her offer, and broke off a piece and put it on a napkin, walking back into the living room sensitively. I didn't know what to say to her.

With the lights on, I could see she was seated with her legs folded under her knees, and her arms gripped a pillow to her chest. The curves and folds of her clothing and arms were dusted blue by the lights of our too-big-TV. She stared blankly, and her face drooped down into a frown. Not just one of concentration, the corners dipped downwards, deeper towards the ground. The frown that you can feel, but can't get rid of. I looked at her, leaning a hand to the light dimmer, and turned the lights up slightly, so that I could see the room more clearly. The only family room I know without a fireplace.

"Are you okay?" These words were a surprise. I never usually got myself involved in Gabriella's problems. It sounds mean, but it's not, I swear, she changes too much for me to keep up. Her moods are all over the place. I've figured out it's better not to try to figure them out, there was a strange barrier formed in between us. I wasn't meant to know little things about her, which is something I forgot in the moment. But I inched forward sitting down on the edge of the couch, trying to take a smaller bite of the pizza growing greasy in my palm.

She moved slightly, reacting to my question. She just tugged her shoulders upwards, making herself grow a few inches, and the frown on her face became more subdued. "Yeah," She said. Her eyes remained on the screen, moving with the people. They were singing karaoke, and the girl was wearing a pink wig. I recognized the actress faintly, but looked down, chewing a modest mouthful of lukewarm food.

We watched the movie for a few minutes, and then she glanced over at me. "How's Peter?"

I swallowed before speaking, giving myself a chance to think. I figured her intentions were innocent. So I shrugged. "He's good," I said with a nod, smiling. I looked at her. "I met his older brother today."

She looked over at me for a second. "Oh, what is his name?"

I dropped my hand into my lap, holding onto a thin piece of crust I had been nibbling at. "I am not positive on his last name, but his first name is Nathan." I said. "He's Peter's step-brother, so I don't know if you know him. You might, he's a little older."

"Nathan," She repeated, looking over at the TV. "Is he cute?"

I nodded a little. "Yeah," I said. "I guess." I went back to nibbling.

"Find out his last name," She said softly. I nodded, and she brushed some of her hair behind her ear. We looked back at the TV. Now the girl who had had pink hair just had normal hair, and was walking through a monostary-type place. The screen was colored mainly pink and blue. I watched her walking across. She always watched kind of funny movies.

"Are you and Peter going to get serious?" She asked.

I paused for a second. "I hope so," I said. "I really like him."

"And you've been friends with him all this time?"

"Yeah,"

"It's so weird."

"I know."

She looked over at me, and I could hardly recognize her. Maybe it was the fact that the room was so dark, and the only real light was coming from the TV, which had grown considerably dark; for some reason, when I looked at her, something happened and her face seemed to have transformed into someone else's. There were small things that made her face hers that seemed to melt into the shadows- like maybe the corner of her lips, or the blackness of her eyelashes. Maybe she just wasn't wearing make-up. "I don't even remember you mentioning him." She said. "And all of a sudden you're dating someone."

I sat back for a second, looking at her, and she looked back at the TV. She wasn't accusing me of anything, but there was something biting in her tone. Right then I couldn't figure it out. With that one stupid, meaningless sentence the room became tense. I got up first to go upstairs, knowing I couldn't stand being the second to go.

* * *

**A/N: **_Hey there, I have gotten a lot of new readers here who have made themselves know via Reviews, and I'd like to thank you and welcome you all! _**Please, feel free to review, I read everything, and write for you. **_I know this one is short, but I hope you keep reading! I love to hear from all of you, and I love knowing you guys have kept reading. Have a good day, or night!_


End file.
